Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

All right kittens! Here’s another Personal Ad Challenge. Guess the title, author and heroine’s name (for the love of God, DON’T FORGET TO INCLUDE THE HEROINE’S NAME) and win yourself a spankalicious Smart Bitch title.

Make Me Purr

SWF, hotshot doctor, soul trapped in pet cat’s body after attempting to escape a fire set by nefarious co-worker. Please help me escape this body because grooming my ass is starting to give me a serious case of the squicks. If you’re my OMGHOT ex-husband whom I divorced for rather silly reasons, even better.

Behold, Darlene, for your most speedy and most correct reply, The Smart Bitches Dub Thee:

You know the drill - give us the title, author, and heroine’s name and we shall bestow upon you a spiffy Smart Bitch title.

Raider of my Lost Heart

Heiress to family fortune, born to shop but stifled by parental oversight, seeks young man from the wrong side of the tracks to start a hot, passionate, and impossible-to-resist romance. Must be willing to wade through 300+ pages of big, little, mid-size and Escalade-sized misunderstandings disguised as corporate intrigue thrown in the way of our happily ever after. 

Good grief. I literally fell asleep within moments of coming home last night. One moment, I was laying in bed and engaging in a really silly and funny and profanity-filled debate with my husband about who does more around the house (he thinks my cooking shouldn’t count since I have so much fun doing it, I think his washing the sheets almost every week shouldn’t count because he’s the sweathog who makes weekly sheet-washing sessions necessary), and the next moment, bam, 6:30 a.m., my glasses are all askew on my face and my bladder is killing me. The saddest part is, that is the second night in a row I fell asleep before 7 and without eating dinner. So, yeah. I’m officially a Pathetic Sack of Shit. Many apologies to fiveandfour for the delay.

So without any further ado, behold, fiveandfour, your glorious new title! Go forth and and henceforward be known as:

All righty, folks! Another Friday, another personal ad contest, whoop-dee-doo! Guess the correct book title, author and heroine’s name, and find yourself the winnah of a beautiful and much-coveted Smart Bitch aristocratic title.

Love in the Age of Aquarius

SWF, antique shop owner, like, totally into spiritual enlightenment and chakras and stuff, looking for a guy to share some good times. I’m a redhead, tall (5’10") and curvy (120 lbs.). If you’re a pig, though, I’ll, like, totally mace you with some hairspray. So please don’t be a pig, or all uptight, or whatever. Oh yeah, I hope you’re into, like, belly rings, because I have one and it’s totally hot.