Longmire’s romance covers are undeniable works of art. And so are some of Jen’s versions, under the pen name Avril Honeycutt.
[Thanks to Iasmin for the link]
Her 1: “What are you reading? Oh, hey, I read that book.”
Her 2: “This book is amazing. OMG. It sucks you in. I can’t put it down.”
Her 1: “Totally does, doesn’t it?”
Her 2: “Oh, yeah. You can’t believe how compelling it is to read. I feel like changing my entire life, and following each section of this book.”
Her 1: “Wait, huh?”
Her 2: “Seriously, it’s incredible, how this book has touched me.”
Her 1: “Oh...you’re not kidding. I mean, it was a quick read but -”
Her 2: “No, no, not quick at ALL. I’m savoring every phrase, and contemplating each one. It’s taken me ages to decipher some of the meanings behind the prose.”
Her 1: “I don’t ... I mean… wow.”
Her 2: “Lewis is just an incredible writer.”
Her 1: “Lewis? Don’t you mean Meyer?”
In a recent comment, Jennifer Echols mentioned No Plot? No Problem, a how-to manual by Chris Baty, founder of NaNoWriMo.
According to Echols, “He suggests that before you sit down to write a novel, you make a list of everything you love to see in novels. When you write your own novel, you should put the stuff from your list in there. Then you should make a second list of everything you hate to see in novels. When you write your own novel, you should make sure none of the stuff from that second list creeps in when you’re tired.”
Ooh, neat. But looking at that idea from the perspective of a reader, I can generate an equally useful list - for shopping and seeking recommendations.
Here’s my list:
To all the Jewish readers of this here hot pink site: l’shana tova. This evening is the start of the Jewish New Year 5769.
Seriously. Could there BE a more fabulous opportunity for Jewish inspirational erotica? I mean, 57 varieties of 69? Hide the pickle?! Here, I’ll even give you a visual for creative inspiration:
I’d also like to share a greeting to all of you, Jewish or not, which I received today from an Israeli SBTB reader named Vera:
Just wanted to Wish you a happy Jewish New Year, Shana Tova Ve Metuka.
May your readership increase like the seeds of the pomegranate, may you succeed with any new enterprises, be the head and not the tail.
Once upon a time, Candy wrote a review for Shayla Black’s Decadent which has since become one of the most linked-to portions of the site, and was the nadir of a little-known gem of internet delight known as “LOLPorn.” Seriously, people link to that entry with astonishing regularity.
I don’t know if we’ve ever really expounded on our deep love for the folks who read this site, but damn hell and howdy do we love y’all. When we hold contests with other folks, invariably they’ll write, “You have the best readers, OMG.” It’s true. You guys are freaking awesome. Why? Because of shit like this that is so funny I wheezed and Hubby came running to make sure I wasn’t going into anaphylaxis.
A website that reviews romance novels from a couple of smart bitches who will always give it to you straight. No bullshit. No gushing--unless the author really deserves it. To find out more, read all about us or check out our minty-fresh and funkadelic FAQ section.
Subscribe to the General Bitching posts in RSS
I was away when this one was originally posted but I’m stunned nobody suggested that fourth hand was “in her ass savin her life” or somesuch.
Or did I miss it?
Hysterical as always, ladies and…
From Teh LOLHandz Winnah!
This teaser pic is so artistic. Great choosing. Well done!
It makes me want to cry, but we’ve got an anti-gay marriage amendment on the ballot in AZ, too, and it looks like it may well pass. Help us, Obi-Dan!
He had be at Hooke’s Micrographia, but I think the Enigma machine actually broke something. *whimper*
