Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

In our last request for international romance, a few folks wrote in with romances that take place aboard a ship, and though the characters might be English, the locales were certainly not.

As a spin off, I thought I’d ask the Bitchery for pirate romance, or any high seas romance they’d recommend. I’m personally a sucker for pirate romance, because it’s a lot of fun to say, “YAAAAR!”

Pirate and high seas romances can easily be campy and fun, particularly because some of the problems that faced the crews at that time can mercifully be avoided, particularly the more awful illnesses. Seasickness? Ok. Often occurs, in fact. The trots? Oh, heck no.

Personally, I had a heck of a good time reading Pirate Prince by Gaelen Foley, particularly for the glee with which she amped up the more fantastical elements of the plot.

Also, there was a book I once read, and of course I can’t remember the title or even the heroine’s name, but she was a pirate with a long, wicked scar on her forearm. She also had an arch-enemy who was mad as a March hare who desperately wanted to impersonate her. Ultimately, the arch-enemy was attacked by a parrot who gave her a smiliar scar on her forearm, enabling her to launch her own evil-pirate career as a doppelganger to the heroine. But that’s about all I remember. However, it was an equally fun read.

So - what nautical tales of romantic mahem do ye recommend, mateys?

I don’t read comics very often, and when I do, I’m lucky enough that my comic book geek friends often recommend me the best of the best.

Last weekend, I read the first issue of Wormwood: Gentleman Corpse, and I have to say, I’m in love. The artwork is gorgeously Gorey-esque (and, well, gory), the characters are oddball and charming (what’s not to love about a sentient maggot who possesses the body of a corpse?) and the glimpses of backtory fascinating. If you’re into humorous horror, this comic will be just your ticket.

Yeah, it’s not a romance novel, but comics are pretty damn trashy, right?

Ah, the Romance! Not set in the US or in the United Kingdom? You have the hankering for the man-tittied perfection that is the Fabio, a perfect Italian stud hero?

The Bitchery is here to help you out:

Ah, the American West in historical romance. Petticoats. Horses. Leather. Men named Chet who want to get in your petticoat and who smell like leather, sweat, and horses (and why does that turn people on? I’d run for the hills if approached by stanky Chet).

American Western Historicals also present a unique opporunity: your antagonist? The force acting against your couple? Throughout the WHOLE BOOK? Could be the weather!

Now that is an opportunity right there- The Weather Channel: “It Could Happen Tomorrow - The Romance Series.”

If you’re not thinking cold fronts, what Western Historicals would you recommend?

I rarely participate and try to leave the brilliance up to y’all, but I have to put in a word for one of my faves. I am a sucker for old school Jude Deveraux, and I love Wishes, particularly for the somewhat cranky “fairy godmother” who thinks being thin will solve the heroine’s problems (she’s so wrong), and who conjures herself up a year’s worth of People magazine to amuse herself for an afternoon.

So - what other Western Historicals would you like to recommend?

Candy discussed this topic at length in a rant about children’s books that are way better than the Harry Potter series, and a lot of you had some fantastic recommendations for YA and children’s novels that were better than HP and his division of children into four ranked groups (that’s the part of the HP series that bugs the hell out of me: “You’re lame and ineffectual, so you’re a Hufflepuff.” WTF?).

Candy requested good children’s novels and books to read aside from HP, and while I’m sure there will be some overlap, I wanted to send out the Bitchery Request for Recommendations - YA Romance.

Simon & Schuster is releasing YA Romance under SimonPulse. I’m sure other publication houses have similar intentions. So, if YA romance is having a surge of sorts, what YA romances do you recommend?