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DefiningRomances:NoIckiness,Please

by Candy Thursday, September 08, 2005 at 10:59 AM

There’s currently a very interesting discussion going on right now about narrowing the definition of romance in the comments section of our Gayle Wilson interview. Go check out the whole discussion, but I’ll excerpt the bits that interest me most here.

Reia kick-started things by saying this:

If there are no boundaries as to what may be included in the genre called “romance,” what exactly are asking for?  A non-genre genre?

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Dissent,SmartBitches,AAR,andotherassortedgoodies

by Candy Monday, August 22, 2005 at 11:00 AM

Unlike my usual M.O., I actually spent all weekend thinking about this issue and talking about it with many different people before blogging about this issue. There are a few things circling my head right now that are bugging the hell out of me, and I want to address them head-on, because being all quiet and shushy and privately bitching about these sorts of things with friends rarely resolves anything. So, to wit:

1. The issue of intelligent dissent (or lack thereof) on Smart Bitches.

2. The “SBTB hates AAR” assumption that seems to be forming among certain people--well, one person I know of for sure, but if there’s anything I’ve learned about discussions on the Internet, if there’s one person who’s willing to speak up about an issue, there are a whole lot more who are thinking the same thing.

3. Netiquette when it comes to debating/disagreeing with someone.

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SmartBitches:Apparently,WeHateChrist,NotJustMan-Titty!

by Candy Wednesday, August 10, 2005 at 10:25 AM

Someone on one of the AAR messageboards has accused us Smart Bitches of having an anti-Christian slant.

Candy’s Take:

Confession time: Organized religions in general give me a mild case of the heebie-jeebies. Organized religions in particular that make a very stark distinction between the saved and unsaved, those who Got God and those who Don’t Got God, tend to give me even more heebie-jeebies. The latter claim I’m going to burn in Hell and/or am Satan’s minion for the lone fact that I don’t believe in the right deity, regardless of how good or bad a person I actually am; would you blame me for feeling just a teeny bit uncomfortable?

But the people who identify themselves as belonging to a certain religion? They’re such a varied bunch that I can’t make blanket judgments about them. It’d be impossible. As with anything else, I take ‘em on a case-by-case basis. If they deserve to be made fun of or taken to task, then I try to call it as I see it.

For example: A Christian pharmacist who won’t prescribe birth control to someone because he believes it’s “chemical abortion” is an asshole (as well as deserving of having his degree yanked--what kind of shit chemistry and biology classes did this motherfucker take?). The same pharmacist who does this AND refuses to return the prescription to the customer so she can fill it elsewhere is a super-duper, grade A, mecha-Streisand stupid asshole; the fact that the asshole’s opinions are informed by his religious values also makes him a religious asshole. That doesn’t change that he’s an asshole, first and foremost. He could be ANY religion. In this particular case, he was Christian. I’d call him a Christian asshole.

But some people insist on reading that as me calling all Christians, alla time, assholes.

So let me make this clear once and for all (even though I’ve said this many times before on this blog): Assholism is a major religion in and of itself, and its practicioners range far and wide. Assholism is oftentimes caused by fundamentalism: the belief that you have the inside line to God (or non-God, as the case may be), know what’s best and everyone else needs to live only according to your values. Atheists, Christians, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, Jainists, Zoroastrianists, Scientologists, Pagans, Worshippers of the Puckery Purple Men of Uranus, whatever--all of these have their share and then some of assholes.

I’ve said some inflammatory things on this blog before, but I’d like to know: were any of them attacking Christians and Christianity as a whole? I’d like to think I’m careful enough to make it clear that I’m usually talking about specific individuals or sub-groups, and not the Christian population as a whole.

There’s a difference between talking about the group, and talking about individuals. Perhaps we all need to learn to read more carefully when it comes to these sorts of statements?

Unless y’all want to argue that asshole fundamentalist Christians are the only true Christians around. I certainly don’t.

Now, if you want to talk about a group of people that us Bitches have consistently and ruthlessly attacked, I can tell you exactly who they are: Cover models. We’ve called them everything from child molesters to gym monkeys. If Fabio ever wants to take us to task for making unkind statements about him, he’d have a rock-solid case.

I seriously doubt you’d find the same level of hateration for Christians on this site.

Sarah’s Take: Since my blog was mentioned in that particular conversation over at AAR, I have been tempted to respond. But for the life of me I can’t figure out what I’m being called on the carpet for, there. It seems the complaint is that my strong feelings of Christianity might bleed...somewhere. Aside from the biohazardous nature of my alleged opinion, I have to wonder: Do I have strong feelings about Christianity?

Sure I do. I think that the teachings of Christ as depicted in the gospels are some damn fine code of human behavior, and a marvelous demonstration of fair ethics that everyone could do well to emulate.

Heck, you could say that because I liked those ethics of Jesus’ so much that I converted to Judaism in 1999. I used to be Christian, now I’m a homie of Christ. And last time I checked, Jesus was not down with harming other people in his name. Moreover, the tenets of Judaism and Christianity advocate for treating everyone with respect, honor and kindness.

So am I anti-Christian? No. Like Candy, I am anti-fundamentalist. I think the root word of “fundamentalism” is Mental, and that people who hurt others in the name of religion need some serious cans of whoopass cracked in their vicinity. I think ostracizing anyone who doesn’t believe what you believe is like revisiting 6th grade gym class every day of your life.

Furthermore, I do not have any problem with people who achieve peace and happiness through great devotion to their religion.

I do have a problem with people who, having achieved their own peace and devotion, seek to bend me to their will and force me to adopt their ways. If it works for you, great. But do not force your religion down my throat, even if it is my own. So I’m not going to hold your little Scientology cans in the middle of 42nd street, nor am I going to tie t’fillin (which I wouldn’t be asked to do anyway since I’m a girl and all), I’m not going to shake the lulav with you, and I’m not going to kneel and recite the rosary because you think I ought to do so.

I wonder if the root of the comments regarding our alleged anti-Christian bias lies in our personal dislike for inspirational romance. I personally do not enjoy it, because I feel that the underlying rhetoric of those few inspirational romances that I have read is that as a non-Christian, I am not saved. I find shades of the exclusive rhetoric that permeates orthodoxy of all religions in the structure of inspirational romance, and I feel that it does not apply nor appeal to me.

Do I rant and rave and yell that inspirationals should not be considered romance? No. I don’t care if RWA devotes an entire award to them; I know that personally, they are not my cup of holy water, so I’m going to find my romance elsewhere. But does disliking inspirational romance make me anti-Christian? No.

However, I refuse to change my opinion on man-titty.

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WorkingonOurReadingComprehension

by Candy Friday, August 05, 2005 at 10:06 AM

A lot of people have been very, very indignant at Terry Pratchett for his comments on J.K. Rowling, flinging accusations of jealousy, pettiness, etc. Me, I’m just shaking my head.

A little caveat: I enjoy Terry Pratchett’s novels, whereas I think Harry Potter is mediocre at best. At any rate, I’m quoting, in full, what Terry Pratchett wrote:

WHY IS it felt that the continued elevation of J K Rowling can only be achieved at the expense of other writers (Mistress of magic, News Review, last week)? Now we learn that prior to Harry Potter the world of fantasy was plagued with “knights and ladies morris-dancing to Greensleeves.”

In fact the best of it has always been edgy and inventive, with “the dark heart of the real world” being exactly what, underneath the top dressing, it is all about. Ever since The Lord of the Rings revitalised the genre, writers have played with it, reinvented it, subverted it and bent it to the times. It has also contained some of the very best, most accessible writing for children, by writers who seldom get the acknowledgement they deserve. 

Rowling says that she didn’t realise that the first Potter book was fantasy until after it was published. I’m not the world’s greatest expert, but I would have thought that the wizards, witches, trolls, unicorns, hidden worlds, jumping chocolate frogs, owl mail, magic food, ghosts, broomsticks and spells would have given her a clue?

Terry Pratchett
Salisbury, Wiltshire

OK, maybe it’s my prejudice shining through, but this really sounds more like a rant about popular (and inaccurate) misconceptions of fantasy than an attack on Rowling. What clued me? This sentence: “Now we learn that prior to Harry Potter the world of fantasy was plagued with ‘knights and ladies morris-dancing to Greensleeves.’” That seems to shift the focus from Rowling to what the journalist wrote about fantasy.

Anyway, Neil Gaiman addressed this miles better than I ever could, so if you haven’t yet, go read what he says.

And by the way? If Rowling DID actually say she didn’t know she was writing a fantasy novel (and given the way people are misquoted in the papers, I’m doubtful she said exactly that), I agree with Pratchett’s snarkery.

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PoliticalIncorrectnesisthenewPoliticalCorrectness

by Candy Tuesday, July 26, 2005 at 09:24 AM

I was reminded of why I avoid visiting the AAR messageboards yesterday. They’re a wonderful avenue of lively discussion, but OY, they’re such a time suck--and not only that, they sometimes contain some of the most jaw-dropping sentiments. Not only do I disagree with them, but I think they’re quite astoundingly silly.

For example, from this message on the AAR Reviews board (the thread started out as a discussion about Lisa Valdez’s The Passion):

Political correctness is diluting and changing our language, and in its name, there are many traditional behaviors that are no longer PC. Classic romance is all about “When men were men and women were women.” Today, the heroines have an edge--they banter with the men, they are as aggressive as the men--they might as well BE men. And the heros are drawn to them because they are “different” and “more exciting and stimulating” from the usual women they meet? What rubbish! Who wants a wise-cracking, sarcastic virago who doesn’t need a guy for anything because she can handle it all herself? With these tougher heroines, there is nothing much left for the men to be, except “gentler,” more “sensitive,” and the heroine’s “best friend.” More rubbish! I like your descr1ption: “A contemporary romance set in 1812.” I live in 2005 and I read historicals to get AWAY from contemporary life.

I wrote a reply, as did someone named Lisa. Go read ‘em if you like. Myself, I’m staying far, far away since I’ve said all I wanted to say on that board. There was, however, an issue that was brought up in this post that I didn’t address in my reply, and that’s the issue of political correctness.

Robin, one of our regular visitors, has mentioned in one of her comments that political correctness has come to mean something bad, but “something is only ‘PC’ based on your own subjective standards of conduct.” She hit the nail on the head. Nowadays, when a powerful figure makes a blatantly racist, sexist or otherwise repugnant statement, any attempts to point out the shitfulness of said statement are immediately labelled attempts to be PC, therefore wrong or suppressive or unrealistic. Shit, ifeminist.org has labelled The Vagina Monologues as PC, and while I do think that parts of it are disturbingly anti-male (something other friends of mine picked up on as well), a play in which a roomful of women are encouraged to scream out “Cunt! Cunt! CUUUUNT!” with almost orgasmic fervor could hardly qualify as politically correct without twisting around the definition of PC quite a bit.

I’m not saying that it’s impossible for political correctness to go too far. People squealing when someone uses the word “niggardly,” for example. That’s not just PC going too far, it’s just plain ignorant. See that dictionary? Learn to fucking use it. The etymological portion of the definition might be of especial interest. I might even start up a society: The Association for the Preservation and Appropriate Use of the word “Niggardly.”

But back to historical romances. Blaming the departure of old-skool romances featuring alpha assholes and simpering ninnies on modern political correctness is grossly inaccurate. First of all, I think the answer is as simple as this: The market changed. I read those old-skool romances as a young child, before I’d even HEARD of the term “political correctness"--hell, this was before the PC movement gained steam--and before I learned what feminism was. The stories still bothered me. All I knew was, I really didn’t like the way the heroes were rewarded for being mean. I’m going to guess that a great number of women felt much the same way, and started glomming romances that featured heroes who were actually, y’know, NICE once in a while, and publishers, who are in it for profit, after all, perked up and took notice.

Look, if old-skool type romances were still overwhelmingly popular, d’you honestly think publishers wouldn’t be pumping out new titles the way they are vampire romances and chick lit? I’m not going to be simplistic and claim that publishers sell exactly what all the readers want, all the time, but they do generally respond to market pressure. Hey, I wish there were more medieval romances and romances featuring heavily-tattooed atheist heroines; you won’t catch me blaming this lack on political correctness, though.

Second of all: Why in the everloving fuck are some people so eager to label strong, capable, independent women with a sense of humor as mannish and undesirable? Hey, I’m not especially fond of unrealistic superheroines who are capable of taking over Daddy’s floundering company before she’s out of leading strings, either, but honestly, I encounter far more heroines of the exact opposite kind in romance fiction: heroines who fuck up consistently and require the hero to save their fucktarded little asses. And even then, I don’t think of the unrealistic heroines as being unfeminine. Frankly, romance doesn’t have a problem with masculinizing its heroines. It does have a problem with feminizing and idealizing the heroes, but this happened even in old-skool romances. What, you think any self-respecting guy, much less a tough-ass captain and rapist extraordinaire, would say some of the absolutely mortifying things the hero does in The Flame and the Flower?

And third: lamenting the departure of alpha asshole heroes in historicals because they’re no longer PC somehow assumes that some of the things these jerkwads did (such as repeated, unremorseful rape of women) was condoned in ye olden tymes and somehow some sort of historical fact. The idea that these types of heroes are somehow more convincing for their time period makes me want to bang my head against the desk. The idea that these types of heroes are real men while the heroes who refrain from doling out physical, verbal and emotional abuse are watered-down pussies makes me want to bang my head even harder. I guess having a Y chromosome and a set of cock and balls is not enough to make someone a real man. Ye have to RRRRRAPE the wee lassies, mon!

Political correctness, while occasionally verging on silly, has made people think about the language they use and re-evaluate cultural attitudes, and that’s always a good thing. No, I don’t believe that changing the language will change societal attitudes--witness what’s happened to the word “special” once people started using it to describe retarded kids instead of calling them, well, retarded. And “retardation” and “retarded” were (still are) bona fide medical terms before being co-opted by assholes everywhere (including me) as an especially pejorative synonym for “idiot.” But in terms of effecting greater cultural change, thinking about the language we use, the attitudes we carry and why we say things the way we do is a decent first step. Yes, some people go off the deep end, but them’s the breaks. In my opinion, someone who uses PC as some sort of all-purpose whipping post is engaging in lazy thinking. It usually stands in for “my opinion is unpopular, and it’s not unpopular because it’s wrong, or because the majority of people just simply hold opinions different from mine--it’s because of POLITICAL CORRECTNESS.”

p.s.: Blame Sybil for providing the initial link to the discussion.

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