Smart Bitches, Trashy Books | Romance Novel Reviews | Come for the Dominican Bitches, Stay for the Man Titty

by SB Sarah • Tuesday, May 29, 2007 at 09:27 AM

That Nora Roberts. She gives any author or writer many, many things to aspire to, from positions on bestseller lists all over the world, to a backlist as big as my backside, to knowing that at any moment, should you wish for a Nora Roberts novel translated into Aramaic, someone probably sells it. It’s a lot to comprehend, that writing career of Nora Roberts.

And now we have a marker that few will ever attain, a moment of recognition so huge that I stop in awe and think, “Holy crap, I so want to drive to Maryland.”

Seems Ms. Roberts is a huge baseball fan - and I bet, from my bitter position in last place of my Rotisserie leage, that HER Rotisserie fantasy baseball team is in first place from opening day until October. And it seems the Hagerstown Suns, a single-A minor league team, have decreed July 6 Nora Roberts Day at Municipal Stadium.

And behold, the moment of recognition that few shall attain: The Nora Roberts Bobblehead.

The first 1000 fans who arrive at the stadium will receive the very first ever created Nora Roberts Bobblehead Doll.

Take a moment and consider the awesomeness that is your own Nora Roberts likeness nodding away at you from your desk. You can use it to build your own WWND Shrine. Working too hard? Should you take a break for chocolate?

Nora nods, “Yes!”

Someday, will you personally be the single greatest author the world has ever known?

Nora nods, “Yes!”

Is your every written and spoken word a stroke of inimitable brilliance?

Nora nods, “Yes!”

What could be better than nonstop gravitationally-guaranteed affirmation from a world-famous best-selling author? Few things, unless that bobblehead comes with a free bag of boiled peanuts, but I don’t know if such delicacies are sold as far north as Maryland.

Either way, I’m seriously considering a road trip. Do you think I can convince my husband to drive 5+ hours to Hagerstown for a baseball game with an 18-month old in the backseat in mid-July heat when I am pregnant out to here?

Nora nods, “Yes!”