Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

It’s probably trying to keep them similar enough that each new one is recognisable to fans, but i do agree that they may have gone too far 0-0 They would be hard to read when lined up next to one another on a bookshelf.

They are impossible when they are next to each other on the shelf.
I really need to update my list of stuff I have read and my tbr pile. I just bought another copy of something already in the tbr pile- which is actually 3 tbr boxes of stuff.

Would this qualify as an addiction??

All I know is that I just finished The Ghost and Mr. Madman and I’m blown away.  Will be reading all the others very soon!  I don’t really care what the titles are!

ev, I dunno—I have an entire TBR shelf.

I adore these books, and am constantly pissed off at the titles. Why do they need to be so long?? And why, oh why, do they need to have such ridiculous covers?

She writes such wonderful books, full of really hot sex and humor and tension and then she gets the cheesy covers and stupid titles. I’d be pissed if I were Kresley Cole.

Oh, I’m so glad it’s not me. Even trying to track down the last one (after the short excerpt you guys posted here, I was hooked and had to read it) was an exercise in “waitaminute wtf”. I basically had to keep a cheat sheet with me, and once I was in the bookstore, open the book up to make sure I was getting the right one.

Now I just have to decide which one to get next,... (which again would be easier with slightly more distinct titles. “Wait, did I decide on…”)

“Wicked Pee on an Electric Fence”

I love it.  Is it about an alternative Canine Society living quietly in the Suburbs on a secluded compound a la The Breeds Chronology?

If it was my story to write, I would add my Buddha the English Bulldog as one of the main characters that cannot be bound by any damn Electric Fence. As an alpha male Bulldog, he feels not the pain of the zap of electricity, only the zap produced by a certain shapeshifting female willd turkey/mole ( I had to customize the storyline to the fauna of my actual neighborhood).  Will their opposite body parts ever be allowed to attract?  Perhaps when they join forces to oppose the pernicious garden eating groundhogs.

Your Wicked Pee on an Electric Fence had me gasping for breath because I was laughing so hard!

How about Dark Deeds during Happy Hour?

“Lick My Horns”

LOLOL!!!!!  Ahhh.. that’s good. 

Thanks, I needed that.

Gennita was just playing with these titles last week, scrambling the words for fun:

Click here

I agree 100%!

I loathe trying to take about these books! I’m like, huh, yeah, the one with the ghost in it!

:)

Snape Gazes at Redhead’s Jugular

That just killed me dead right there, lol. I got a weird look from someone in the office because I was giggling so hard. XD

“The Amazing Hie” is on my “Top Ten Books Ever Read” list.  And I read over a hundred books a year.  The H/H are memorable.  The secondary characters - memorable as well - all had plot-driven reasons for being there and weren’t obvious sequel-fodder.  And?  BEST FIRST LINE - EVAH.

I hate that the titles and the covers kept me from reading this series for so long.  Teh Corm, I don’t liek it.

But they are so great, it pissed me off even more when I liked them so much.  Although it was great that I could read the entire backlist of them in one fell swoop.

I’m not creative enough to do the entire series, but here is my submission for Playing Easy to Get:

Myst’s Destiny: Taming His Raging Hard-On

Karmelrio:
What was the line?  I can’t remember, and now it’s BUGGING me!

I am currently reading one of these books, and for the life of me I can’t tell you the title LOL. I could go get the book and see I guess but I’m lazy. I know that Merlin is in it and Merlin is a female and the heroine is cursed as an ugly crone.  Good book but I agree, the titles could be more distinctive.

Hmm…how to stay an anonymous as possible…

I have a strong hunch that these titles are directly from the author’s editor at Pocket.  She and the other editors there are obsessed with themes and alliteration—(Liz Carlyle’s “One Little Sin” trilogy, Sabrina Jeffries’s of “Only a Duke Will Do” fame.)

I remember how mystified I was when I heard that Julia Quinn’s late summer release was titled “Mr. Cavendish, I Presume”.  What on earth could Avon be thinking?  I supposed now that she is so big for them, they didn’t need to bother with a cutesy-wootsie title to sell the book. 

But the more I thought about it, the more I liked it.  There seems to me some genre-stretching with this title, and for me, that’s a victory.

I know that Merlin is in it and Merlin is a female and the heroine is cursed as an ugly crone.

Er, are you sure?  That sounds more like Kinley MacGregor’s Lords of Avalon series.

yeah well I was close. LOL
That’ll teach me to be too lazy to go to the bedroom and pick up a book.

Snape Gazes at Redhead’s Jugular

Snape is doing what to Ginny?

Lick My Horns rules them all!

I’m with you all on the titles. Yeah, it makes it easy to identify the books as being part of a series, but they are so similar as to blend together in my mind at times.

I read (at Dear Author, maybe?) that this was a good series to explore for those fed up with Ward’s Bhlack Dhaggher Bro-mances, so I picked up the Hot Ghost and Beast one at Target.

I honestly think I would have liked the book better if I left it at home and didn’t try to read it during my commute.  I spent most of what should have been quality reading time awkwardly juggling the book so that no one could see what I was reading because hey, its a lot of man on that cover.  A lot of Man and a title with “dark” and “needs” and “night” in it.

Snape Gazes at Redhead’s Jugular
Snape is doing what to Ginny?

Lily Evans, more like.

I love Lick My Horns.  So apropos for Cade. 

So glad it’s not just me.  I was commenting somewhere about just 2 of these books and had to keep Amazon up so I could flip back and forth, back and forth, to be sure I was saying the right thing about the correct book.

(I lovedlovedloved Dark Desires After Dusk; Cade totally made it for me.  I didn’t realize until I was finished reading it how much I was hungering for a story with some fun and fantastic dialogue.  It’s a real shame I can’t remember the title of the blasted thing so I can share the love more readily.)

I love Nix.  She is just bugfuck crazy.

Just about everyone I’ve talked to hates the titles of Cole’s books, and loves the books themselves.  The last two titles are just beyond ridiculous, especially being released so close together.  How am I supposed to keep the Dark whatchamacallit and the Dark somethingelsethatdoesntmakesense one separate?  It’s impossible!  Lick My Horns is a way better title, and you know it would be impossible to forget it.

Cole isn’t the only author with annoyingly similar titles, though.  Anne Stuart’s Ice books are the same way.  Although her titles aren’t ridiculous, I don’t know how I’m supposed to keep the title of one Ice book separate from another.  To add to the confusion, all the book covers for the series look exactly the same, too, so you can’t even use something like Snape Gazes at Redhead’s Jugular to jog your memory.  I walked by her latest release in the book store for three weeks before I realized it was a new book.

Okay, now the Vampire’s Little Lady book I just finally read—A Hunger Like No Other—Actually, the Valkyrie and the vampire are the same person, and the hero is a Lykae/sort-of-werewolf guy. He seems to be slurping neck like a vampire on the cover, but according to the book, he not only is not a vampire, he hates vampires (and thus hates the heroine, since she’s half-vampire). So actually, that title could be the Valkyrie, the vampire and the sort-of-werewolf…

I have had AHLNO on my TBR shelf (of which there are two—plus a couple of boxes) for a Long Time and never got around to reading it till I read a review of Lick My Horns on Dear Author. So I picked up the ghost and Mr. Madman, but read the secret virgin mistress book first, since it had been sitting on my shelf so long. And I LOVED it. To pieces.

Then I decided I needed the demon and the prissy mathematician book too—but I had a really hard time figuring out which book I already had and which book I needed. Fortunately, I’d opened the ghost book and read the opening pages so I was able to recognize the actual story, even though I couldn’t remember which book I had by the cover or the title.

Now I will have to get the rest of the books. I am looking forward to Snape looks at the redheads neck. :) I always did like Snape/Alan Rickman

And yes, I am going to have to get the latest Ward book just because I can’t stand not to know what everyone is talking about, and because I want to at least catch up with Jon’s story.

I love Nix.  She is just bugfuck crazy.

I’m with you, karmelrio. I read the books for the little we get of Nix and cannot remember anything distinctive about the others, their titles, covers, characters—well, OK, I really liked Kaderin—but that’s about it.

I like these

Monkey Sex on a Dusty Tree
Wicked Pee on an Electric Fence

There’s something wonderfully evocative about the titles.  I wonder if the demons are totally immune to electric shocks.

Looking at a larger image of the cover in this entry, it does say the series title on it, but doesn’t give the number of this book in the series; is that information on the book’s spine or anywhere else on the book?

As a reader, I really wish more publishers would put information like that on the cover (“Second book in the Meow Meow Meow Trilogy” or “Conclusion of the Love’s Eternal Perfume Series”). Surely it’s possible to do that without disturbing the graphical design of the cover? Then again, I am just a lowly reader….

This happens to me with other authors, too.  I’ve started checking the first printing copyright date on the inside to avoid re-buys. 

I bloody freaking HATE it when they re-release a book under a different title. 

Death to those weasels!

Those are hilarious titles! Anyone computer savvy enough to mess around with the covers and put in the funny titles? “Lick My Horns” would be my first improvement. :p

I don’t give a rat’s ass about the titles; I’m too busy drooling over Nathan Kamp.

BTW, would somebody mind explaining why the word wicked shows up in so freakin’ many titles—and not just Cole’s?  I actually blogged about this, it had me so mystified.  (Then again, I am easily mystified.)

I bloody freaking HATE it when they re-release a book under a different title.

I was incredibly thankful when they started putting those special seals on the new Nora Roberts books.  Do you know how many times I bought multiples of hers?

I’m giggling here, but this is the truth: I actually went to the store to buy the most recent (Dark Desires After Dusk) and…bought the wrong damn book (Dark Needs at Night’s Edge). Despite having just read said book. Despite owning said book. Despite having WRITTEN DOWN the correct title of the new book, on a list which I took with me to the store.

I felt like an idiot when I went to return it to exchange it for the right book, and then I found out…I wasn’t the only one who’d made that mistake!

The titles, from a marketing perspective? Beats me - very good question. There is no rhyme or reason to them.

I read the first book in the series and liked it but I had to check the books in the store to make sure I got the next one in proper order.

Coles books are a hoot though with all those screaming lunatic Valkyries, demons and other goulies fighting amongst one another. They are easier to follow if you read them in order.

She seems to have a great following, so I guess the titles and covers must be working from a sales perspective.

And, Nix - yes, she is f______ crazy…

As a reader, I really wish more publishers would put information like that on the cover (“Second book in the Meow Meow Meow Trilogy” or “Conclusion of the Love’s Eternal Perfume Series”). Surely it’s possible to do that without disturbing the graphical design of the cover? Then again, I am just a lowly reader….

THANK YOU! I really would appreciate this myself.

I love me some Nix! She got that fox crazy going on. Master manipulator. I wonder when it’s going to be her turn.

Lily Evans, more like.

Do you know that I completely forgot about her having red hair?

The book with Merlin being a woman and the herione turned fugly IS a Sherrilyn Kenyon/Kinley MacGregor Lord of Avalon book. It’s Varian’s story and I thinkkkk the heroine’s name was Merewyn. The book is called Knight of Darkness. I kind of liked Sword of Darkness better, but I did like Varian.

I honestly think I would have liked the book better if I left it at home and didn’t try to read it during my commute.  I spent most of what should have been quality reading time awkwardly juggling the book so that no one could see what I was reading because hey, its a lot of man on that cover.  A lot of Man and a title with “dark” and “needs” and “night” in it.

After two separate incidents with strangers and the books I love I found this awesome hard shelled (Turtle) book cover.  It slips right over the paper back and poof you have a hard back.  It not only covers up the bad cover art but I don’t have to worry about tearing up the book in my bottomless pit of a bag.  I have only found them at this great used book store around the corner from me.  I am sure they sell elsewhere but I have not been able to find them. 
http://www.bells-books.com/accessories/access.html

http://www.hiddensecretscovers.com/index.html

They only show the soft patterened ones, but I gotta have the pirate one!

I loved the way you reworked the titles!  But in Ms. Cole’s defense, she may have no control over the titles of her books—sometimes that’s at the discretion of the publisher, just as the cover is.

I just hope she reads this blog and appreciates all the hard work you did on her behalf.

This comment will open and close with a fan-girl squee, because I love Kresley Cole and her Immortals After Dark series. A lot. Too much, maybe. I never had problems telling the books apart because after reading A Hunger Like No Other, I pined for each new release. Pined, I tell you! Yes, I know the last two titles were released like a month apart… PINED!!

That being said, I hate the long, almost interchangeable titles like everyone else, and here is my way nerdy way of keeping them straight. Everyone has noticed the interchangeable bits like “dark,” “wicked,” etc. It is the last four or so books that really get confusing, but when you combine the repeating words from each book you get unique combos which are distinguishable with a little mnemonic help. Like so:

No Rest for the Wicked = Wicked Rest = The one with the Hie (She is TIRED from all that vamp killing, ya’ll)

Wicked Deeds on a Winter’s Night = Wicked Night (full moon = awesome jungle sex)

Dark Needs at Night’s Edge = Dark Edge (Like, the edge of sanity, nucking futs Nix!)

Dark Desires After Dusk = Should just be, Lick My Horns, because that is freakin’ hi-larious! (If you can’t remember that, I don’t know what to tell you.)

Heh, I can’t explain about the titles, but do love Kresley Cole’s novels!  And I LOVE the title of your post,  btw!

The Lick My Horns made me snort with laughter so loud, I just woke my husband up. See, I just saw Hellboy 2 the other night and I immediately got this horrid image of the chick in that movie licking Hellboy’s horns as they do the nasty. o.O

I heart ALL of you!