Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

That’s the most of ‘Twilight’ I’ve seen and I really have to say anybody who finds him romantic needs to have their heads examined.  Creepy stalker with an eye issue.  He’s not even good looking, ewww.  I know teenage girls are weird, but ...

Tree porn, rat nest hair and flying sparkly boys who channel their inner flying squirrel.

I loved this.  Buffy has exactly the right attitude for dealing with stalking sparkly bloodsuckers.

Oh. Holy. Jeebus. Best remix ever! The editing was awesome. Although it almost made me sad—Twilight is such a major step back from the empowerment message of the Buffy story. I think I’ll reward myself for finishing my current book by rewatching the series…

That’s the most of ‘Twilight’ I’ve seen and I really have to say anybody who finds him romantic needs to have their heads examined.  Creepy stalker with an eye issue.  He’s not even good looking, ewww.  I know teenage girls are weird, but ...

Me too and I totally agree.

Twilight is such a major step back from the empowerment message of the Buffy story.

Buffy rocked. Watching that only reminded me how much I loved it.

I also haven’t seen Twilight, so I was a bit confused by one of the clips near the beginning of this. Edward looked like he was about to hurl. Was that intentional or just some deeply bad acting?

OMG! Are you twelve?

Best summation evah of Twilight! This remix was utterly brilliant! And it is as close as I’ll get to actually watching the movie. I’m pulling out my Buffy soundtracks!

Ok, I actually liked the books, but this is awesome. Fav part:
Edward: “You’re like my own personal brand of heroin.”
Buffy: “What, are you twelve?”

That was: one awesome, mixed with a dash of badass,and baked until hilarity ensues. Brilliant!

How did the actor who plays Edward take himself seriously? I nearly howled everytime he showed up, with his angsty serious face. ROFLMAO!!!

plan26: Sure, I could watch this 26 more times…

EEEEE!  That was perfection!  I’m going to be smiling all day today (and that will be quite a feat).

Oh, I miss the Buffyverse.  I got cable in season 2 just so I could watch it clearly.

I’ve seen Twilight the movie and couldn’t help myself from comparing it to the Buffyverse the whole way through ... and it only reminded me that there hasn’t been anything good on tv since She went off the air.

Yanno, I’m not over-induced to read/watch the Twilight saga either.  All the angst!  I wondered back then if Buffy had meant nothing to these people: apparently not.

The evolution of paranormal romance didn’t stop dead the day you did…

Of course, they’re making a new Buffy movie—without Joss or any of the Whedonverse characters. What could go wrong?

As a fan of both Buffy and Twilight(yes,it is possible!),this was a great video to watch. Kudos to the excellent editing work done here-the guy who did this definitely has a wonderful future ahead of him,if he plans to be a filmmaker.

And for Buffy fans,a fun game you can play with this is trying to remember which BTVS episodes her side of the story are from.  So far,I spotted Buffy vs. Dracula,Crush and Gone.

Having heard my “creepy stalking is NOT romantic!” anti-Twilight rant and knowing my love of Buffy, my husband sent me that link.  I, of course, thought of SBSarah, thus becoming one of the badrillion.  I’ll just wait over here for my chocolate.

(*innocent look*  I’ll settle for a Sony Reader, though….)

Brilliant! I immediately sent this to all the teenage SciFi junkies I know. They’ll love it. I have so far resisted the temptation to send it to the women my age (30’s and 40’s) who are Big Twilight Fans. I’m not sure they’d see the humor. ;-)

I really want one of those t-shirts that says:
“...And then Buffy staked Edward. The end.”

Another one here who has so far avoided twilight, who will now never read or watch it.. lol

Though to be fair, a friend who is a fan of twilight did point out that there was some creepy almost stalking stuff that Angel did in the series..

I really want one of those t-shirts that says:
“...And then Buffy staked Edward. The end.”

Seriously??
So need one of those.

I’m a Buffy fan all the way, but Edie‘s friend is right. Some of those clips are originally from Buffy interacting with Angel and Spike—two stalker-y, angsty vamps who she went on to have tortured love story arcs with.

I mean, Bella is right up there with Edward as the worst part of the Twilight books for me, but Buffy was not really known for her healthy relationships either.

HOWEVER! This video still kicks ass. :)

This is definately how the sparkling vampires should be taken care of.  Buffy is awesome.

That was awesome.

I miss Buffy.

I really want one of those t-shirts that says:
“...And then Buffy staked Edward. The end.”

Oh major ditto on this! I haven’t worn slogan shirts in ages but I would so wear this one!

spam word: industry32 If I were 32 and industrious, I would industriously create 32 tee shirts and pass them out.

I had to watch it again to figure out where the Harry Potter bit was.

Hm…anybody care to come up with a graphic? Cafepress here come the SB’s!!

live43: 43 more years to live!? Well, at least now I know.

Okay, the page is not letting me post a link but the “And then Buffy staked Edward. The End.” shirt is on jinx.com.

Trying for a link.

So far,I spotted Buffy vs. Dracula,Crush and Gone.

I spotted Bad Eggs.

Though to be fair, a friend who is a fan of twilight did point out that there was some creepy almost stalking stuff that Angel did in the series..

I’ve been re-watching the series for a few weeks now (actually i’m watching the 4th season premiere right now), and I have been thinking the same thing.  I hadn’t really watched the first 2 seasons in awhile, so when I watched the first few Angel episodes, I thought Twighlight, not that i would ever read the books or watch the movies.

Nineteen badrillon people can’t be wrong. This video so rocks! Are you sure we can’t have a contest to win the t-shirt…and chocolate?

  Though to be fair, a friend who is a fan of twilight did point out that there was some creepy almost stalking stuff that Angel did in the series..

I’ve been re-watching the series for a few weeks now (actually i’m watching the 4th season premiere right now), and I have been thinking the same thing.  I hadn’t really watched the first 2 seasons in awhile, so when I watched the first few Angel episodes, I thought Twighlight, not that i would ever read the books or watch the movies.

And to be fair about being fair, it’s true that Buffy had sketchy taste in men but that was a big part of the point of both the Angel & Spike story lines. She didn’t marry and/or procreate with either of them and neither of them turned out to be her Twu Lurve.  By the end of Buffy and Angel all three of them had moved on from those train wrecks.

The difference is that Buffy never lost her power. Angel was stalkery, but when the time came she could kick him in the nutz, not to mention kill him. (It’s okay, he got better.)

The bulk of the Angel relationship was when Buffy was a teen and that’s why there are parallels to Twilight—the difference is that it was never played as anything other than a girls’ first love, and how all-consuming that can be—and she still abandoned that to be responsible.

Spike never even got close to equal footing—well, maybe toward the end. Buffy used him as a way to forget her depression and as a life-sized sex toy. When she realized this, they broke up, and she noticeably used his real name.

His stalkerish tendencies were played for humor at the character’s expense—with one notable exception which seems to be about making the fans dislike the character. The more overblown Spike was in his “bad boy” persona, the more you could count on a scene where we discovered he was a bookworm, a bad poet, and a mama’s boy.

He quite notably acknowledged he was Love’s Bitch.

Buffy acknowledges in the last episode that she’s not ready for a relationship with anyone:

Buffy: I’m cookie dough. I’m not done baking. I’m not finished becoming who ever the hell it is I’m gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day, I turn around and realize I’m ready. I’m cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat m- or enjoy warm, delicious, cookie me, then that’s fine. That’ll be then. When I’m done.

That was just plain awesome.  Loved it.

Oh, this was sooo good!  By comparing the two, it’s so awful to see how bad “Twilight” is.  Buffy rocks!

As another of the badrillion people who sent this link to SB Sarah, I’m glad so many people liked it and hadn’t yet seen it.

I really want one of those t-shirts that says:
“...And then Buffy staked Edward. The end.”

My son has this shirt; the first time he wore it to school, he made a girl cry.  Ah, Twilight angst!

We bought it at J!nx, as someone said above.  Go forth and purchase!

My son has this shirt; the first time he wore it to school, he made a girl cry.

Okay, maybe that shouldn’t have made me laugh, but it did.

Also, if you want to watch a relationship between a human and vampire where the vampire is not simply a hot immortal dude with fangs, the best evah! is Sunshine by Robin McKinley.

Yes, there’s a romantic relationship, but the vampire is ALWAYS alien and other and dangerous.  He may be sexy, but he’s a weird, alien, inhuman sexy.

  My son has this shirt; the first time he wore it to school, he made a girl cry.

Okay, maybe that shouldn’t have made me laugh, but it did.

@Lizzie (greeneyed fem): Thank god it wasn’t just me.

Not sure, but I think the opening alarm-clock moment is from “Once More With Feeling”.

I want that shirt.  Never seen Twilight, don’t know if I’d like or not.  But Buffy rules and i want that t-shirt.

I do so love a happy ending. It’s just so… satisfying. *happy sigh*

And I totally want the t-shirt. Now if I could only remember what site I saw it on… Ha! Found it! It’s at http://www.jinx.com, Buffy Staked Edward Women’s Tee (or, for men, Buffy Staked Edward T-Shirt).

SonomaLass: ROFLMAO!

I totally want to wear the shirt and go hang out at a bookstore. The last time I was at a brick-and-mortar bookstore, two weeks ago, I watched two women each purchase some kind of collector’s set of the Twilight books. I wanted to comment, boy howdy! did I want to comment, but kept silent since I figured they had a right to buy whatever cranked their engines without snide comments from me. After all, no one comments on my purchases. (Except my family, of course.) But the tee would just say it for me… more eloquently than I ever could. Does that make me a mean girl? *g*

How did the actor who plays Edward take himself seriously? I nearly howled everytime he showed up, with his angsty serious face. ROFLMAO!!!

He didn’t. Oh, how he didn’t. Both he and the lead actress pretty much snark on the series and its ridiculousness whenever possible. Don’t believe me? go to cleolinda.livejournal.com and check out her entries tagged sparkle motion.

Oh this was awesome coated in wicked dipped in cool sauce!  I was laughing like crazy the whole time—even my husband thought it was funny, and he only got about one chapter into Twilight before wallbanging it. 

I’ve been following Yes, I Read It.  It’s Still Stupid. for my continued Twilight mocking enjoyment, and recommend y’all check it out too if you enjoyed the video.  Rachel’s *good* version of Twilight is funnier than all heck.

Security word plans62—62 best-laid plans gone awry?

I absolutely LOVED that!

Have any Twitards shown up yet?

And so it came to pass…. That Buffy beat seven bells out of Edward the Awfully Written ! Bliss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don’t mention the proposed Buffy revamp (PUN…did ya notice?)  No Joss….No chance of success !

This. Is. Perfect.

‘Also, if you want to watch a relationship between a human and vampire where the vampire is not simply a hot immortal dude with fangs, the best evah! is Sunshine by Robin McKinley.’

Ah, Suze, you’re my new best friend. >Waves a copy of Sunshine at the screen<

That was amazing; I absolutely loved it.

I don’t know if people here are familiar with MST3K, but the people who made that show now produce Rifftrax, where they sell audio tracks to play alongside the movie and just make fun of it the whole time. I watched the Twilight Rifftrax, and while it was hilarious and I recommend it to everyone, I still needed alcohol to get through it. The funny still needed liquid help to combat the bad.

(but again, I totally recommend the Twilight Rifftrax to anyone who used to like MST3K)

God, I hope somebody stakes Edward.  Even as a teenager, i wouldn’t have liked him.  Very creepy.  Now, for a great vampire, I go with Angel (David B.) or Frank Langella or Richard Lynch (my favorite blond vamp).

Or in books, favorite vampire would have to be Cian from Nora Roberts’ Circle trilogy.  Snark and angst and heroics and some serious hotness. 

Oh, and some of the vamps in Charlaine Harris’ Southern Vampire series (more commonly called the Sookie series), particularly the crew in Dallas.

Has22?  I would love to have 22 vamps as long as they are the good guys.

I read the books, saw the movie and liked them all.

But this was genius! Fantastic!

For all that I enjoyed Twilight in all it’s forms I am very aware of how overly angsty and drama queenish it was… but hey it’s still about vamps. Love my vampire movies and books.

reason63 - 63 reasons to love this remix are so obvious!

Hands down, the best book vampire is Henry Fitzroy in Tanya Huff’s Blood series.  A smart, sexy, competent detective heroine and a believable sexy vampire—with mummies, shapeshifters and mad scientists thrown in for good measure throughout the books. 

If you’re really interested the DVD of season one of the series based on the books just came out.  It’s called Blood Ties and is fairly faithful to the books—they had the author’s input in production.  Watching the series is far far better than the Twilight movie fiasco.

Henry Fitzroy in Tanya Huff’s Blood series.

Plus, in the books, he’s a Romance Writer!  (I still like Sunshine best, though.)  *waves back at Kezia*

Apparently everybody who saw the video wanted the t-shirt; the Jinx site is down. I do want to to warn those of you who are thinking about ordering the shirt that, like pretty much every other seller of cool t-shirts on the internet, their sizing is wonky. The women’s shirt says that it goes up to a 2XL, but if you check the size chart, 2XL is like 38” in the bust, which is a size 12.

Spamword: rest87. Yep, the rest of the 87 places to buy shirts with slogans don’t sell to fat chicks either. Sigh.

    My son has this shirt; the first time he wore it to school, he made a girl cry.
  Okay, maybe that shouldn’t have made me laugh, but it did.

@Lizzie (greeneyed fem): Thank god it wasn’t just me.

ditto - if there are other people doing the same thing, does that mean I am not evil?

No staking Edward for fattys like me??
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Thanks MichelleR for giving me fuel for arguing with my friend over the twilight vs buffy. LOL
Must admit it has been a year or two since I watched the series and was struggling to argue as all I could remember of the romantic relationships was that I hated Buffy in love.. lo

Joss rocks BTW.. lol

Loved this for giving a credible ending to a crappy movie. I saw it a month ago and I didn’t remember seeing half of the scenes; I think that tells how memorable it was.

And regarding how Angel and Spike were also stalkery and Buffy’s relationship with them was twisted, the point of difference between Buffyverse and Twilight in this aspect is that Twilight treats the unbalanced relationship bet its leads as something wholesome and envy-inspiring while in Buffy, Whedon makes it look as unhealthy, bitter and dark as it is. Everyone around Buffy isn’t happy about her relationships (except the Riley one and that was b.o.r.i.n.g!) Of course people romanticize Buffy’s relationship with Angel and then Spike but the series itself was very clear about how creepy and sometimes irredeemable both of them were.

And best vampire ever according to me, definitely the Sunshine guy. My god he was droll and grounded, what an awesome combo for a vampire. Has anyone ever come across a practical vampire (I wouldn’t count Louis in this as he was just a milk-soaked-cardboard, mind you, I love Louis)? For those who read m/m, Jordan Castillo Price’s Bill in her Channeling Morpheus series is wicked awesome!

-anin

Practical vampire?

I’d say that the version of Dracula in Fred Saberhagen’s The Dracula Tape and The Holmes-Dracula File qualifies. These are straight fantasy rather than romance, but compact and very readable.  There are a number of further volumes in the series, but the first two are the best by a considerable margin, as later entries become increasingly oblique.

Someone mentioned “Twitards” earlier, a term with which I wasn’t familiar. xkcd, one of my favorite cartoons, created its own awesome in a similar vein (oops): http://xkcd.com/591/

ME: *giggle* “OMG this is so funny!” *snort*

My 13 year-old daughter:  *glare* (pointing at screen) “THAT IS SO NOT FUNNY!” (stomps off)

She keeps trying to convince me to read the Twilight series (she has about 12 times each) and I keep evading… I had plenty of angst in my own teen years, and plenty more to experience in my daughter’s life now, I really have no desire to read about someone else’s.

And count me as another big fan of Sunshine, though I also enjoyed the Saberhagen Dracula books as well.  : )

I am one of the few that have not seen Twilight but did LOVE Buffy.  I fell off my ass watching this.  I do agree with Angela James - don’t see the attraction for Edward as shown in the movie.

Watching this video makes me realize what a breath of fresh air Buffy is.  You’ve got the fantastical Edward and his angsty stalkery feelings and Buffy’s tone is like a cold shower of realism.

Loved the video.  I’ve tried to read the first of the
Twilight books but not being a twelve year old girl, the only redeeming thing I could see was that she at least had the kids reading.  Haven’t seen the movie but I know I would still prefer Buffy.

A coworker sent me that video last week.  I love it, and will adore Buffy and the whole Joss Whedon oeuvre until the end of time…
but especially Buffy.
And Angel is SO much better than Edward in every possible way.

Just wore “THE” T shirt to the cinema…cue lots of   smirks, &  many   tweenage sniffs (OK I took the spawn to see Ice Age 3. ....It’s fab BTW!)
  But there can be only ONE vampire,  and it is the utterly
wonderful, sumblimely psychotic Spike !

lol. I particularly liked the shot of cedric diggery.