Categories: Random Musings • The Link-O-Lator
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by SB Sarah • Tuesday, January 22, 2008 at 06:54 AM
I’ve received a great many email messages asking me why I am not speaking out about how the news has made me feel, what I think personally about this subject, and why I have been so circumspect in delivering my usually unabashed opinion.
“There is so much to discuss,” people have said. Why am I not providing more of a forum and starting the conversation by definitively revealing my personal opinion, calling the spade what it is and getting on with it already? “Never tell me you’re going to start being politically correct, you wussy,” one reader said.
It has taken me a few days to articulate in any organized fashion my reaction, which until now has consisted mostly of noise. Lots of noise invoking fury, indignation and disappointment. To learn with great disillusionment that someone admired and liked by many is not at all what I thought… well, it did rock my world more than a little.
Some will say this is old news, that I ought to let it die already and not resuscitate it, but this is my forum, my website, and it’s time I revealed what I really think - not that I’ve ever been accused of holding back.
78 comments •
Categories: Random Musings • The Link-O-Lator
Categories: Random Musings • The Link-O-Lator
So his energy drink tastes like scotch?
Oh my god, I could have beaten the shit out of him.
Hee! Hee hee hee.
But does that Details writer have a man-crush on Fabio or what? He seems to be lusting after the expensive cars and the dogs.
It is freezing out. Fabio is wearing just a T-shirt.
Uh-huh. It’s southern California. My dad, living in Westminster, was also complaining about the cold this weekend. It was 50 something.
Poor Sarah!
You can still buy me a drink. After enough of them, I swear, you’ll think I’m Fabio.
snarkhunter said on...See, I was thinking his energy drink was made of something a little more appropriate to his romance-novel-cover-artist career. It’s bottled man-seed!! It will give you energy, all right. And those sperm are so energetic that if women drink it while they’re fertile, his Olympian swimmers will actually plow right through the various digestive organs to get to the lonely egg.
Oh my God. I have just disgusted myself so thoroughly...I want to go lie down now.
maria said on...sorry to hear about your disillusionment, SB! I will gladly buy you a drink and we can discuss long hair and large pectorals all nite long!
I don’t know he strikes me as such a snotty rich white guy he could suck the aphro out of the aphrodesiac
Okay, this is totally off the subject, but I had noticed a severe lack of bitchery presence on my (Livejournal) f-list and… for some reason the RSS feed isn’t working! FOR DAYS NOW I’ve been without the bitchery! THIS AIN’T RIGHT, Y’ALL!!
*breathes deeply* I feel reborn now. I have come home!
Randi said on...I never really cared for Fabio. Too long of hair, too big of pecs, too vapid of expression.
Not my cup of tea. Or scotch.
HOWEVER,
BIG BIG fan of Clooney. Ah....*heavy sigh* Clooney.
I really want to know the REAL deets on what went down in that restaurant. It just seems odd that Clooney would meander over to FABIO’s table to drop some verbal shiite. Probably, we’ll never really know…
Ummm...did you get a chance to read the comments at the end of the article? I’m really hoping that they are tongue in cheek.
Seriously, the guy thinks because he only thinks insults at his dates that he’s a gentleman?!
Narcissistic much?
I would say I told you so, but I didn’t know about this blog when I told everyone so. He’s poo. I never thought he was sexy, good looking, articulate, or anything but his own biggest fan. Poo. And I never use that word.
Kim said on...Oh Fabio, Fabio, Fabio....when are you going to learn? Talking is not forte. Just sit there quietly with your massive man-titty and let me brush and amortize your pretty, pretty hair.
Arrg...not *your* forte...I need to preview more often
JaimeK said on...Oy! I think he needs another goose in the honker! I always thought like you did Sarah -there are lots of us out there that were just plain wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.
MplsGirl said on...I was also thinking his energy drink is made from spooge, not poo. Think he’s been bottling it for years, waiting until he, umm, collected enough?
azteclady said on...Madre de Dios!
All those comments on the all so sekrit ingredient for the fantabulous energy drink are making me feel nauseated.
Ugh.
Kit said on...Oh, Fabio. He’s never been my type, because he looks to me like someone who has never had the stillness of his mind intruded upon by a single thought. I guess I was wrong - he has lots of thoughts, and they’re all stupid.
he likes to tear up the nearby trails on his motocross bikes, despite the persistent efforts of local park rangers to arrest him
I don’t think the ferrets would approve of that sort of behaviour.
“And they are always complaining about their work, or how they are not working. About this casting or this part they are hoping to get, and I have to say, ‘Come on, you’re a fucking waitress.’ I don’t say that, but I think that, you know, because I’m a gentleman.”
Ah, Fabio… you are a prince among men.
I fear I may swoon!
Yikes, those boobies must be implants. They look scary.
mlg said on...One had to at least suspect, given the fact that his very small head is much to small for his pumped up body, that there wasn’t a single intelligent thought inside.
I would say I told you so, but I didn’t know about this blog when I told everyone so. {...} I never thought he was sexy, good looking, articulate, or anything but his own biggest fan.
You and me both, Ciar. I only extracted the “poo” remark because frankly my thoughts on Fabio aren’t that strong.
Poo or his semen? You decide…
Donna said on...I never cared for Fabio. Now John DeSalvo is another story! John is yummy!
Maybe he should be included in the Mitchell Report now that even musicians are being accused of juicing up. Hey! Maybe that the secret ingredient!
Abney said on...It’s not true… I refuse to believe it.
He’s just misunderstood… I can change him.
He just needs a new publicist…
Alas ~A
Jenns said on...*Uh-huh. It’s southern California. My dad, living in Westminster, was also complaining about the cold this weekend. It was 50 something.*
But, Lorelei, it’s brutally cold to us! (I live in L.A. county.)
Ah, Sarah, sorry you were disillusioned in this way. Can’t say I ever saw much in Fabio (like Randi, I’m more of a Clooney girl), but I do have a story to show just how much appeal he had, once upon a time.
In the late 90s, a friend of mine came to stay with me for about a week. A total intellectual and literary snob
(the kind of person who won’t read Nobel Prize works because they’re too popular).
Anyway, one day I was taking her on a tour of some of the sites. We stopped for gas at a corner of a busy boulevard. (Can’t remember which one now.) As I was filling the tank, she was out talking to me. Suddenly she stopped. I looked up to see why, and she’s slack-jawed and pointing. “Isn’t that Fabio?” she says.
Sure enough. He was stopped at a light, in an expensive-looking sports car.
To be honest, I don’t remember anything else about that day, but I’ll never forget the look of awe on the face of my usually reserved, ‘highbrow’ friend.
While he still hasn’t found the “one special lady"—because he is exacting, demanding “the best woman possible"—he believes that he will find a woman with “good family values, good morals.”
I guess Britney is out of the running.
Probably for the best since Fab would look far more believable in the white dress.
FYI There was a good interview with Fabs in the Dec/Jan 2008 RADAR magazine by Spenser Morgan. They included one of Fab’s covers:
Savage Promise by Cassie Edwards.
HEE!
Daisymay said on...No, no, no.
There can only be one ageing man with flowing hair and overdeveloped pectorals pimping out a dubious energy drink, and his name is Steven Seagal.
http://www.agonybooth.com/articles/Steven_Seagal_s_Lightning_Bolt.aspx
jocelynnesimone said on...While he still hasn’t found the “one special lady"—because he is exacting, demanding “the best woman possible"—he believes that he will find a woman with “good family values, good morals.”
SBSarah, I think I used to share your opinion, a sort of fondness for Fabio because he seemed to be always joking at his own hype. But this, oh no, I am irked to say the least. Che Carcioffo! Che bestia! I hate this kind of double standard where he can have all the “chicks” --did he really use the word chick and without humor!!-- he wants and still expects to find a nice girl. He’s a walking petri dish. What nice woman with good morals is going to be interested in a piece of him? Bestia mia!
Seriously what century is he living in and what definition of gentleman is he working with? Now I have to go read some Gaspara Stampa or something to wash the taste of bad Italian caricature out of my mouth.
I agree with Abney, it’s not true! This must be another attempt of his to use the industry.
Shame on you, Sarah! Losing faith like that!
Seriously, this man should have his own column—Fabio Tells It Like No One Else Can
No, no, no.
There can only be one ageing man with flowing hair and overdeveloped pectorals pimping out a dubious energy drink, and his name is Steven Seagal.
http://www.agonybooth.com/articles/Steven_Seagal_s_Lightning_Bolt.aspx
omgroflmao!
And by “good morals” I should state that I mean what society usually lays out as good morality ie: not sleeping with hundreds of models. This is the kind of moral standard that in my opinion Signore Fabio is referring to. I thought I better clarify since otherwise I sound like some sort of ravening prude when really I’m just irritated by his double standard.
shaunee said on...SB Sarah,
Have you tried transferring your love to someone else? I would hate to see all that adoration go to waste.
Why not fixate on The Rock a.k.a Dwayne Johnson? He’s quite handsome and large of pec, though I heard somewhere their shape and/or largeness was due in part to plastic surgery. Still, that’s not nearly as heart breaking as
“And they are always complaining about their work, or how they are not working. About this casting or this part they are hoping to get, and I have to say, ‘Come on, you’re a fucking waitress.’ I don’t say that, but I think that, you know, because I’m a gentleman.”
Think about loving The Rock, SB Sarah and let your heart be healed.
Candy said:
Fabio, it seems, has given the most egomaniacal interview in the history of the world.
Oh-hhh, the perils of believing one’s own hype.
And George Clooney is teh hawt! I’d rather have a drink with him than that other guy, any day!
Angelina said on...I am so sad in the pants about this. I always loved Fabio because he seemed so irreverant to the fame he had. Now, I see the truth.
That’s it Fabio, I will no longer defend your honor!
“...looks like a muscular ostrich wearing a jennifer aniston wig”
this image will stay in my mind till the end of my days…
Oh shaunee, if SB Sarah wants to find a new selfish egomaniacs who thinks nothing of destroying the positive impressions their most devoted fans, then yes, Dwayne “Please Forget I Used To Be The Rock” Johnson is a fine choice. But reading her reaction to Fabio’s latest interview reminded me a great deal of my feelings towards the man who used to be The Great One.
Joanna S. said on...“And they are always complaining about their work, or how they are not working. About this casting or this part they are hoping to get, and I have to say, ‘Come on, you’re a fucking waitress.’ I don’t say that, but I think that, you know, because I’m a gentleman.”
Mrrr? I can’t imagine WHY he would think that he is superior to a “fucking waitress,” as he seems to be a “fucking man whore.” Indeed, he waitresses of the world are too good to go slumming with him...in fact, ladies, don’t even serve him food. Next time he’s in YOUR restaurant, don’t ask for his number. Don’t ask for his autograph. And don’t EVEN think of petting the man-titty. Nay! Instead, say to him, “we don’t serve man-whores here; you can have this Red Bull to go.”
Then give his well-honed ass the kick it deserves-- to the curb.
I feel shame for having enjoyed his fridge magnet poetry at the I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter website. Yes, I once defended him. I mean who could take himself seriously whilst shilling margerine? But no. The dream is dead.
Dammitjim, does NO ONE take romance readers seriously?
“That is a Husqvarna 450 RR,” he tells me when we go out to his driveway.
My mom has a Husqvarna. But it’s a sewing machine.
But this does solve the Clooney vs. Fabio match up angst. Clooney, baby! Sweet, sweet Clooney…
willaful said on...I just read that line about blowing Fabio to my husband, who looked down at the hot dog he’d just cooked and commented, “well this now looks a lot less appetizing.”
So I was at this supremely boring meeting and of course my mind wandered. . . I found myself remembering that reality show where the pretty chick had to pick between cute guys and sweet/geeky guys. Remember she picked the cute guy? Suddenly the fact that he freaked out on discovering she dated Fabio makes more sense. He knew something we didn’t . . . the truth.
Thanks for sharing that article. Fabio needs to sit quietly, shirtless, the wind from off-stage fans blowing his hair… And I’m not sure who comes off worse in that Clooney/Fabio account.
closetcrafter said on...Sarah, oh Sarah, how sad for you. Between teh “Cassie Edwards-gate” and teh fall of Fabio, life must seem bleak. Where have all the heroes gone?
I’m guessing - just guessing, mind you - that Fabio doesn’t want to let go of it because it’s the only thing keeping him in the spotlight and in folks’ minds right now. Sounds kinda desperate,…
Clooney has a solid track record as an actor, and isn’t in such dire need of publicity at this time.
Just saw this in the NY Times:
Our boy George is a Oscar nominee for performance by an actor in a leading role: George Clooney in “Michael Clayton” (Warner Bros.)
Argh. Make that ”an Oscar nominee”,…
~ sigh ~
As Starina would say, “Try more gum.”
woman33 - well, yes and no
ack well who wants to hear him talk anyway.. Fabio, just let your hair down, hand me the margarine and get nekkid!
I actually met Fabio on several occasions, this was before he became an asshat.
In 95 I met him at one of the RT conventions and he was really nice, down to earth - you get the picture. He’d come into a ballroom and was up on stage meeting fants, getting his photo taken etc.
A woman came in via a wheelchair and there was no way she could get on the stage to meet him. So Fabs stopped what he was doing, climbed off the stage just to talk to this one woman. I could see it just made her day and I thought that was a lovely gesture.
Then there was the time he was walking through the pool area and was flinging his hair so hard he walked into a tree.
No bull.
Trees, birds,…
What’s next, low-orbit satellites?
“But reading her reaction to Fabio’s latest interview reminded me a great deal of my feelings towards the man who used to be The Great One. “
Wayne Gretzky?
word - further27 - yeah, a little further...but not much!
J.C. Wilder, how do you know he wasn’t just “using the [romance] industry”? I mean, he’s a gentleman! He’s not going to openly sneer at a wannabe actress no matter how much he think’s she’s just a fucking waitress; and of course he’s not going to tell the women at a romance convention that they’re pathetic, love-starved housefraus, though that may well be what he thinks.
So much anger at Clooney. Here’s a guy who’s had people swoon over him all his life, but he’s still jealous of the good looking guy with recognized talent. Competitive and jealous much?
And such emphasis on the things he’s acquired! As if that demonstrates some value as a human being.
I was never a big Fabio fan, but now I feel sorry for the guy. Poor dude has money and looks, but apparently they’re sapped by psychological problems. He’ll never know happiness.
fabioschmabio. Did you read the comments over there? Those beyotches are so ready to take on that clooney p**** etc.
Fabio is funny. His fans are skeaaary.
Poor Sarah. I think we’ve all had that feeling, at least once, when we find out someone we admired was a big, fat idiot. You need new man titty.
Okay, I’m confused now. I always thought Fabio was gay...anyway, I guess he just needed some publicity for his energy drink, whatever that is. Hence the overblown media coverage of the Clooney incident. There can’t be that many people who think he’s a celebrity these days.
Uhm, I’m failing to see the disappointment in Fabio. I read the article and got this out of it:
-Fabio doesn’t think modeling is all that serious a job, oh, someone whose name rhymes with Schmara Skanks, who thinks it’s a spiritual calling.
-Playboy and actor George Clooney, who’s about 5’8, was talking trash about some romance fans who won a prize of having lunch with playboy and ex-model Fabio. Fabio, who’s 6’3” and a former paratrooper, spoke up and threatened Clooney. Uhm, exactly who’s the jerk here?
-The journalist kinda dissed the fact that Fabio’s got a bunch of big dogs running around his house. He didn’t mention that the five dogs are rescued animals.
-Fabio’s full of himself. Yeah, well, he’s a wealthy Continental sex symbol. That tends to happen.
These magazine interviews can be poison. The writers hate the people they interview and their angle is the good old American “Let me take this guy down a peg” kind of destructiveness. Bottom line, it’s easy to get anybody to sound like a fool.
And sometimes they are fools.
Note to self: If I ever get famous enough to be asked, decline.
Poison Ivy has a point. Maybe he was just showing off. Not that I think Fabio is fabulous but Clooney annoys me.
If he lost thirty pounds and cut his hair, ditched the jeans, and stopped looking like a member of the Village People… maybe then I wouldn’t laugh quite so much.
But he accepted the Slashie award on ZOOLANDER!
Is he not self-aware?
Come on, can you seriously get angry at a guy who can say with a straight face to a reporter that he started fucking before he even had sperm? That line cracked me up. A lot.
I, like Sarah, find self-deprecating humor to be oh-so-sexy. And I, like Sarah, am very disappointed and saddened to see my main reasons for justifying my lurve for this romance cover icon get amortized in the face. Bragging about his cars? Lame dude, just lame. (and did the man say “titty bars” !?)
If there is a female equivalent to boner death...this is it.
I don’t know Italian, but in Spanish amortiguadores are shock absorbers, and amortiguar is to absorb or lessen something. So I suspect that there must be a similar word in Italian and that that’s where Fabio’s use of “amortize” is coming from.
Heather said on...Seeing that article reminds me of this priceless moment in MST3K history.
I guess they’re just not making them like this any more:
http://www.classicmoviefavorites.com/colman/taletwo7.jpg
http://www.facade.com/celebrity/photo/Pierce_Brosnan.jpg
http://www.dvdbeaver.com/film/DVDReviews25/a%20motion%20picture%20masterpieces/PRIDE_PREJUDICE-8.jpg
Replacement for the one that didn’t print:
desertwillow said on...My random thoughts on Fabio....
Dude’s face is too big for his body.
Shirt open to the navel doesn’t work in real life.
The guy just plain don’t have anything going on in his head.
He does nothing for me but if Clooney acted like an ass he probably needed his butt kicked.
SB Sarah, if you’re looking for an over-developed hunk to replace this guy with watch Smackdown. Batista should fit the bill nicely. Not sure if he has anything happening in his head but he’s got the pects.
SamG said on...I was disappointed too. My one thought of an excuse for him is this is a magazine aimed at guys, right? Maybe they like to hear about owning a load of bikes and cars and having so many women you just call them chicks (don’t have to remember names that way). Male fantasy.
Still, he can’t remember the grass is greener but has titty bar down pat....seems like selective learning to me.
Sam
Nike said on...Is it possible that the entire interview is a really big misunderstanding? That the cultural and language differences between America and Italy have created this . . . travesty?
Perhaps we should not let go of our regard for Fabio based on one interview that he may have given at the wrong time of the month.
Or maybe he’s a gigantic ass. But I think I still love him a little bit because I laughed my ass off when I read what the God of Man Titty had to say.
Oh, my! Thanks for posting those pix, talpianna, ‘specially of Ronald Colman,… oh, gods, what a voice he had, and those *eyes*! [fanning self]
re: the fracas between Clooney and Fabio,… yeah, Clooney’s got a smart mouth on hisself, hasn’t he? But I’ll take a smart-ass over a dumb-ass, any day.
decided57 - why, yes, i has decided!
My comment is missing! Fabio conspiracy…
i cant quite cope with how his personal history sounds like a plot of a romance novel (I think i read a hundred presents novel about that italian hero). Like seriously? seriously?
Susan said on...I’m dating myself, but I remember when Fabio was “The Face” of romance. Now I consider him a has been. As for the whole Clooney thing, why would C even know who Fabio is? Of course he thought they were taking pictures of him. Of course he acted like a jerk. He’s a celeb. Fame + men = boys.
Then there was the time he was walking through the pool area and was flinging his hair so hard he walked into a tree.
ROTFPMSL at this, OMG, TOO fucking funny! George, George, George of the Jungle, watch out for that tree!
And holy SHIT, the Lightning Bolt energy drink review? Funniest. Shit. EVAH!!!
*dying laughing*
Amanda Senior said on...I’m with Snarkhunter --- bottled man-seed is where my mind went.
Especially since there is so much protein in the stuff.
Eck.
Sounds to me like Fabio is one of those super egotistical rakes from a Regency or Victorian historcal.
*Sigh* Someone pull him back into the 21st century, please.
Tsu Dho Nimh said on...Good grief! He should have kept his mouth shut.
He’s rude, vulgar and self-centered ... as well as being over the hill with sagging man-titties.
(meeeowch!)
why85? Why not 85, I say!
Anon76 said on...Okay, I’m gonna be booed and hissed at, but…
I totally understood his comment about amortize with the face punching thing. Even found it rather witty. (Ducks rotten tomatos.)
quoted from him in the interview:"I could have punched him in the face while he was on his back. That’s how you really hurt someone—their face can’t amortize the punch so it takes, it takes the whole impact.”
Okay, for me, first he means that with the guy on his back, a punch to the face means the guys head won’t turn but instead immediately impact the ground. No neck acting as a swivel.
But further, that punches to the face have immediate consequences, whereas body punches result in true pain a bit later than the initial impact. So that is an “amortized” pain.
Watch boxers. They will beat on their opponents’ arms and bodies and those “eventually” take their toll.
As to the rest of the interview, gads, don’t want to think on it now.
Lauren said on...Oh Fabio. Really now. Really.
I’ve been thinking lately that DeSalvo is the Fabio of these days but man, that’s now vaguely insulting to DeSalvo...who I haven’t seen on any covers/book art lately come to think....
Though I’m sorta convinced the male model for Secret Diaries of Miss Miranda Cheever is possibly my ex-bartender who also acts. ^^
Sarah,
Fabio never did much for me, but I do think the interview showed him for the vapid sex obsessed man that he is.
Recently I heard on MSNBC the quote attributed to Matthew McConaughey on his girlfriend’s pregnancy.
“Got some blessed news. My girlfriend Camila and I made a baby together. It’s 3 months growin in her womb and all looks healthy and lively so far. We are stoked and wowed by this miracle of creation and this gift from God, and so excited for the adventure that will come in raising this child, being a mother and a father and shepherding him or her through this life. Wish us the best, keep us in your prayers, and God bless evolution.” He then signed off with “Wow, McConnaughey.”
All I could think was “don’t speak. Don’t speak. You are ruining my illusion that you have a brain to match your face and body.”
Matthew McConnaughy and Fabio = Mimbos.
Yeesh.
Now to change the tenor and show a man worth lusting over, I give to you a Frenchman by the name Sébastien Chabal. He’s a rugby player and when I was visiting France last September I watched several of the Rugby World Cup matches. You cannot help but become mesmerized by him when he is on the pitch. Your eyes are drawn to him and you can literally smell the pheromones through the TV.
He’s has a lot of nicknames including: the Anaesthetist, the Caveman, (Seabass - short for Sebastien), but I when I look at him I think of tribal chieftain or a prototypical Frankish warrior.
He not only is a great player who has broken jaws of his opponents when tackling them, but he’s also a cool guy as well. After the Rugby World Cup, he became the most popular athlete in all of France and was offered lots of money to sign with different French professional teams. He chose to stay with the Sales Sharks in England *because of his wife.* Awwww, isn’t that great?
He was being mobbed in France and wouldn’t be able to walk down the street, but in England he can do so without being harrassed.
Such a guy. He turned down money and public adulation in order for his family to have a good quality of life.
Here’s a glamour shot of him:
Oh, and here’s a snippet from an interview that I found from 2006 that shows how funny he can be:
quote:
With his dark curtain of hair in a top knot and his amused hazel eyes, he is less reminiscent of the Incredible Hulk than a French-accented David Bellamy. As well as being cheerful company over a lunch table, he has a nice line in Gallic philosophy. “Why do English people like cricket?” he mused. “The only reason for going seems to be to have a few beers? I find it strange. Surely it would be simpler to go to the pub?”
He is also a modest man with a quirky sense of humour to judge by the vehicle he drives. The red Smart car in the car park would struggle to accommodate a petite Parisian schoolgirl, let alone a 6ft 3in tall, 17st human wrecking-ball known as the “Anaesthetist” in France for his bone-jarring tackles.
Full article here:
He drives a Smart car. Not the babe magnet that Fabio was bragging about. A Smart car! That fact alone makes adore Chabal for it is mind boggling to think of someone his size fitting into such a small car.
You tube is also filled with vids of Chabal. Here are a few choice ones to persuade you that he is worth considering for midnight fantasies:
Oh and even though he is fluent in English, he chose to put a reporter from England in his place a question was posed to him in English while they were in France. This alone won him the hearts of his countrymen:
Chabal is someone I can imagine sitting down at the pub with and sharing a pitcher of beer and having a nice conversation, I cannot envision that with either Fabio or McConnaughey.
Oh and :shudders: Paris Hilton seems to have a crush on Chabal as well. She cut a song that’s on You Tube with Chabal in the title. No pix of him, just her shaking her waif like frame for the camera. That’s not worth watching unless you want to just poke fun at the bimbo.
01.22.08 at 07:10 AM |