Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

C.L. = Coochie Licker?

ROFLMAO!!!!!  *Tears streaming down my face* OMG that was just hilarious (sorry Julie)I’m still perturbed by authors who, in spite of the fact that many readers are vocal about hating heroines that are truly too stupid to live, persist in creating such stupid knitwits.  I’ve decided that I’m a borderline feminist and as such get quite violent when the heroine I’m reading about does things that defy reason and common sense.  It makes me crazy enough to throw my hands up in the air and mutter “Aaaargh, Women!!” in the way that the males of our species are often found to be doing, especially when they’ve just been cut up by a lipstick applying woman driver.

OMG I CANT BELIVE U DIDN’T LIKE TELL ME LIES ITS’ AWESOME U SUK I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL.

This was the first Crusie I read, and I liked it so much I hunted down her entire backlist. Just in time, too, because right around that time her old Temptations started to skyrocket in price. Yeah, the heroine is kind of frustrating at times, but I was so caught up in the story and what was going on that I didn’t care, and I found her more sympathetic than not.

Glad you liked the review Karen. Gosh she ticked me off, that Maddie.

And you know, Candy, I have been asking myself over and over if maybe *I* was in a foul mood that somehow spilled over to this book, but really, I don’t think it was any negativity on my part. I don’t think I would have liked this book if I had been bathed in cleansing oil, massaged by four soft-handed beefcake masseurs, and fed all my favorite foods before being handed this book to read. Much like you can’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining (ew), you can’t say repeatedly you’re going to Do Something, then lie down and stick your head up your ass. That is, if “you” are a heroine in a romance novel and you want me to like you.

Not YOU, Candy. I like you just fine. You kick ass and take names.

Scrubbing the macaroni & cheese pan with the offending undies is one of my all-time favorite scenes (though it’s not my all-time favorite Crusie), so I this is the part where, like Candy, I have to say:

U R like so stOOpid she is the best and U R dum

*snort*

I know I read this book but it’s been long enough that I have only vague memories of it. I don’t remember ever passionately hating any of Crusie’s books with the intensity that you give to this one, but I do seem to remember being frustrated by some of the same actions you pointed out. It’s quite likely I shouted at the book when she didn’t empty the safety deposit box.

There was another book that was popular in the last year, I wish I could remember the name of it. People loved, loved, loved this book and I read the first four chapters in the bookstore and wanted to take it home just so I could throw it against the wall. It had some of the same feelings of stupidity on the part of the heroine. Basically, her husband left her and flew to Tahiti with his mistress and all of their savings and the company earnings. She decided to hide his theft from everyone. She didn’t get out of bed for at least a week. I wanted to beat the crap out of her for not telling at least ONE person what was going on. I hated her. I think that’s probably how you felt about Maddie and so, I feel your pain ;)

Although I adore Crusie, this one did make me want to throw the book across the room.  From the moment she threw out the undies I was like, “WTF?” And Mr Chopped Liver was just that…

It is so cathartic to have people agree with me.

And those who think I am dum? UR 2! Ha ha LOL!

You need to step back from the img src!

But a tabby flipping me the bird (huh)? That’s awesome.

I agree with some comments you made about Crusie’s TELL ME LIES, which I consider one of her weakest books.

Some of her heroines are passive, reacting only to situations, provoking comments and people. And, sometimes, to the point of being passive aggressive. Maddie is one of them. This sort drives me crazy.

I enjoyed almost all her books, but some of her heroines had me wanting to yank my teeth out, just to get rid of the itch. I’d say that in this case I prefer Crusie’s heroes [even moronic ones] to her heroines, which is a Very Big Deal for me to say.

I didn’t like “Tell Me Lies” one bit, either.  In fact, it was the first Crusie I (tried) to read, and it went back to the library unread.  I didn’t try any more Crusie for quite a while and in fact only gave her another try this year.

Faking It was the first Crusie I read and I *heart* it yet have meh to hateful feelings on the rest. I had a theory that the first Crusie you read is the one you love the best and the others just wouldn’t compare. I thought it was a solid theory until I read Carrotbat’s comment. Now, I’m thinking I convinced myself of the theory just as a way to explain to myself how people could LURVE gems like Bet Me, Tell Me Lies and Crazy For You.

that was my first and only Cruise and i couldn’t get into it at all....any other titles i should consider?

Try WELCOME TO TEMPTATION, GETTING RID OF BRADLEY [it’s my first JC book, which should be taken into account], and ANYONE BUT YOU.

I really enjoyed Bet Me and Welcome to Temptation is in the TBR pile--you know, buried under Emma Holly’s back list.

Celtic: I definitely recommend Bet Me. I also really enjoyed Fast Women, though it seemed pretty iffy with many other reviewers. Most other people seem to adore Welcome to Temptation and Faking It, which are related (tracks the stories of the three Dempsey siblings) but are stand-alone reads. Of her old Harlequin releases (most of which have been re-released), I really, really love Manhunting and Anyone But You.

Damn, I need to do a Jennifer Crusie Lightning Review round-up like I did for Lisa Kleypas.

I have to be honest, “Welcome to Temptation” and “Faking It” left me cold.

But “Bet Me” was wonderful.

Has anyone noticed how many mother issues Crusie’s heroes seem to have?  And how the heroine is often really nurturing, and uh, round and soft and . . . I don’t know, but sometimes I freak myself out imagining the hero wanting to nurse a little after sex. 

But I did really like Welcome to Temptation, cold and overbearing mother included.

I’ve really enjoyed reading this review and comments.  It came as kind of an epiphany to me, a woman who considers herself a Crusie fan, that I almost universally dislike her heroines.  It’s the heroes I love.  Jenny can really write great men (mostly).

I hated Fast Women, or hated the heroine.  Psychotic beatch that she was, and poor schlub of a guy who allows the most aggressive woman standing to pussy whip him, well, he should have pushed her in front of a bus.

I loved Cal in Bet Me but thought Min was pretty much a dithering b.  Why didn’t she turn some of that anger on the real source of her issues, i.e., Mom???  Did like Tilda in Faking it and Sophie in Welcome to Temptation, with the caveat that they angsted around a bit more that I was happy with.  But Davy, I’d marry Davy and bear his children in a heartbeat.

I didn’t finish the book. I love Crusie but that book led to me wanting to set it fire and scream ‘BURN BABY BURN!!!!’

Yes, there would be that many exclamation marks I hated it so much. I DESPISE her. I wasn’t expecting to see it on her, but I"m glad it got a D even though I would’ve given it a R.

haha, nice review though.

Ah! I’m the only one of my friends (we’re all Crusie fanatics) that didn’t like this book. I didn’t really hate it but it’s the only one I’ve never picked up to read again and I have to tell you, I reread at least one Crusie book a month. I read it towards the beginning of my obsession and seriously, it just depresses me how much this one doesn’t measure up to all the rest.

I have to agree, that while I am pretty much one of the Crusie Fanatics, this definitely wasn’t her best.  I wouldn’t have quite given it a D, but I have also been told that I’m way too forgiving when it comes to giving out “grades” for things like movies and books--ah well. 

But...I sort of wanted to strangle the heroine when she scrubbed the pot with the errant undies--she should have definitely sent them to her lawyer, but I’m a law student so I might be biased.

Thankgod I’m not the only one severely ticked off by this unholy waste of ink and paper. I loved Welcome to Temptation but I had a swearing fit over this publication - I can’t call it a book or a story. I hope someone shakes her until her teeth rattle if she ever offers up something like this again.

I’m so with you on this.
I’m glad this wasn’t the first JC I read otherwise I would never have discovered the others. I just didn’t get it. I didn’t get her. She wasn’t a Crusie kind of woman. I kept reading thinking WTF?