There’sneverenoughHoff,notevenatSmartBitches

by SB Sarah Tuesday, September 25, 2007 at 06:14 AM

Bitchery reader Renee sent me a PDF that rocked my world:

CheapAss Toys Inc.’s Poseable Hasselhoff.

Wow.

Both Renee and I are totally enamored of the “removable chest hair carpet.”

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Categories: Fun And Games

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Comments

Picture of meardaba meardaba said on...
09.25.07 at 06:23 AM |

Ow.  I’m pretty sure I’m now emotionally scarred, if I wasn’t already before.  Thanks guys, I’ll be sending my shrink bills to you.

Picture of Robyn Robyn said on...
09.25.07 at 06:30 AM |

I like the “one button’s enough” shirt.

Picture of Kimberly Anne said on...
09.25.07 at 06:41 AM |

Garthe’s Pimp Cane??  I didn’t know Michael Knight even HAD an evil twin, but I guess that if he did, it would make sense that said twin would be twirling a pimp cane.

Picture of darlynne said on...
09.25.07 at 06:56 AM |

I couldn’t figure out the extra chins, but perhaps they are movable jaws to simulate the Hoff talking??

Picture of Tracy said on...
09.25.07 at 06:57 AM |

The removable chest hair is great! LOL But why make it removable?  Isn’t chest hair always there~or did he shave it at times?  I don’t remember LOL

Picture of Dragonette said on...
09.25.07 at 07:03 AM |

I like the shorts - they look like they’re straining at the seams and come with a bulge. *snort*

Picture of Kimberly Anne said on...
09.25.07 at 07:12 AM |

Michael was not the only one with an evil twin--KITT had one too!  It’s name was KARR.  No, I’m not kidding.  When my husband told me this, I went to Wikipedia, because I figured he must be lying.  No show is so lame to give both the hero and his talking car evil twins.

I was wrong.  Fetch me the brain bleach.

Picture of Mel-O-Drama Mel-O-Drama said on...
09.25.07 at 08:44 AM |

Okay, this is almost as awesome as the Hoff Plane.

Picture of Sphinx Sphinx said on...
09.25.07 at 08:55 AM |

The Hoff: too much is never enough.

Picture of Tina Anderson Tina Anderson said on...
09.25.07 at 09:41 AM |

Bwahaha! Sorority Hoff!  I think the next SB challenge should be printing out, cutting out, and making posables of the Hoff!

Picture of JC Wilder JC Wilder said on...
09.25.07 at 11:18 AM |

I find it interesting that on said Hoff-groin, he’s wearing a thong with no indication of his gender.

But if one looks at the mind-boggling Hoff-Pants, it looks like he’s packin’.

Is this similar to Lee Press-On Nails except it’s Hoff Press-On Package?

Picture of Kalen Hughes Kalen Hughes said on...
09.25.07 at 11:37 AM |

OMG! We must build these en masse and then we must have some kind of picture contest . . . Where’s Hoff Now? or What Hoff get’s up to when his daughter doesn’t have a camera or maybe Hoff as Fabio, Why yes, that is a My Little Pony I’m Romancing.

Oh, PLEASE!!!!

Picture of Kalen Hughes Kalen Hughes said on...
09.25.07 at 11:38 AM |

Tina thought of it first. *pouts*

Picture of Jenyfer Matthews Jenyfer Matthews said on...
09.25.07 at 11:51 AM |

What I want to know is: Where was this thing when you went to his book signing???

Picture of skapusniak skapusniak said on...
09.25.07 at 12:15 PM |

Is this similar to Lee Press-On Nails except it’s Hoff Press-On Package?

No, I think it’s pretty clear that this is all down to the technical limitations inherent in the posable paperdoll form—even with PDF!—making the proper rendering of the world famous Hasselhoffian Recursion needed for a strictly accurate representation of The Hoffian Package starkly impossible. ;)

Picture of Tina Anderson Tina Anderson said on...
09.25.07 at 06:53 PM |

To Kalen: It’s ok, I posted the suggestion on the internet, that means it’s free for anyone to have!

^_^v

Word: position54

Picture of TrishJ said on...
09.27.07 at 09:11 AM |

LOVE IT! I would personally go with the Knight Rider version.

The radio station was talking about Hoff possibly doing a reality TV show about his adventures on the dating scene...not sure if it’s true, but I’m there to watch if it is!

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