So if the earth shifts in a Bitchy way, or maybe all the readers of this site suddenly get an urge to scream, ‘HOLY CRAPPING DAMN!’ or “FREEWHEELING CUNTMONKEYS!” at about 6 o’clock central US time, we’re sorry about that.
For the first time since, well, ever, Candy and I will actually meet each other outside of chatting via email and over IM and by phone. I’m sure nothing will happen. I mean, it’s totally not a big deal for that much Bitch to arrive simultaneously in the center of the US instead of being safely divided on opposite coasts, spreading the Bitchysnark on our respective coasts and to neighboring countries across our respective oceans.
I’m sure it’s not a big deal in the least, and seismologists won’t even notice a blip on the wiggly needle (unless I fall down, which happens since I have the balance and grace of a drunken elephant wearing inline skates) but just in case, if you notice anything, it’s not a big deal. Just a summit of Bitchery. We’ll try not to cross the streams.
You never make the Bitches touch?
Have fun!
I don’t know what to make of the fact that we had a little earthquake here in Portland last night. Just a quick jolt, no damage, but still – the timing was eery.
I see this as being like the event at Promontory, Utah, when the last spike was driven in to create the transcontinental railroad.
I think gold painted dildoes would be an appropriate marker of this world shaking event in the annals (Heh. Annals.)of bitchery.
I will do my best to amp up my own personal bitchery, so as to hold a balance, at least with the east coast. Someone over by the Pacific needs to do the same, maybe.
Just don’t cross the streams.
Take pictures!
I think you should bring spatulas and body bags, just in case.
I gotcha covered—-E. I’m here on the west coast. I’ll amp up the bitch at 6 pm Central to avert disaster. Shall we synchronize our watches?
Fine punch a hole in the space-time continum! But when Bitches as we know them cease to exist, just don’t come crying to me!!
What are you saying? This will be the biggest meeting of Bitches since Elton John was knighted by the Queen!
Don’t cross the streams is my favorite everyday use movie quote. For example, should my sisters-in-law ever meet (one Italian, one from Kentucky, both only children and addicted to shopping and their own voices), it would be like crossing the streams.
Doh. I missed your last line there. Sorry.
Insert Ghozer or Stay-Puft joke instead.
I used to live in Dallas, and I will warn you ladies to be careful – especially downtown. A lot of those buildings are made out of solid glass, so if your meeting creates a cyclone of winds or something…well, there could be some serious debris.
Of course, maybe just the building that is highlighted with green light will start glowing like a HUGE green beacon of dildoness. Kinda like a SB bat signal.
Report back. The Bitchery needs the lowdown; bad breath, b.o., greasy, lank hair?
One of the good things about Paris on the Prairie (Dallas 😉 is that it’s in a geologically stable area. The closest major fault line is the New Madrid one.
Now that I think about it….lots of people think the New Madrid fault is overdue for an earthquake…