Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

If she hadn’t flogged the old dead horse of romance, I would have really celebrated the following section of her review:

What we need for debate and discussion are accessible histories of all the key figures in Islamic history. As Muslims, instead of honouring these individuals blindly, we will accord them much more respect by opening our eyes to their achievements through critical re-examination of their lives. This cannot be done in an atmosphere of fear and intimidation.

Agreed, ma’am. But while you make a very appropriate point, you do yourself a grave discredit by couching your argument with the weak analogy that it’s as “bad as a romance novel.”

[Thanks to Evaine for the link.]

Checking in with the romance craft world, we have a romance novel fragrance on Etsy, with a citrus/ginger top note and a base of sandalwood and musk, and embellishment tags made from old novels as well. And don’t tell KristieJ about this set of jewelry inspired by North and South.

Feeling crafty right now, and want to do something with your never-to-be-read-again pile of romances? You can make wallets or business card holders out of them. I have one of these, a gift from Heather at Tor - it’s adorable.

[Thanks to Kate for the link.]

And finally, want some catty reviewing… of a fragrance? Enjoy the New York Times’ Moment Blog review of Danielle Steel’s perfume, “Danielle.” The, ahem, money quote:

For the first four seconds it smelled sort of vaguely like a kind of flower that you get in a gallon of floral-scented laundry detergent, and then for five seconds it reminded you of Edvard Munch’s “The Scream.” Then it evaporated, like the prose in a novel by Danielle Steel evaporated from your memory the moment you read it.

I’m so finding a sample of that as fast as I can.

[Thanks to Jessica B. for the link.]

Then, Eilis Flynn wrote an article titled Snappy Comebacks, or, “What to say when some douchenozzle disses your romance again.” I mention it because the original article which inspired this one was published in the RWA eNotes, which, impartially speaking, is the best damn e-newsletter in the history of the universe, bar none.

The article is a hoot because it reveals the technicolor crap comments authors have heard, from party guests to coworkers to media. I was particularly enamored of this one:

Patricia Rice refused to be manipulated by a radio host. “I had a radio interview once at 6:00 in the morning,” she explains, “and when the smarmy host asked if I’d read a passage from one of ‘those scenes,’ I read one describing the hero’s hand.”

I hope the hero had big hands. With long, firm fingers.

But Michele Stegman, author of Fortune’s Foe, makes a point that I hadn’t thought of - and I spend a good amount of time telling people which lake to jump in should they be dissing the romance:

“...When you meet a new couple, one of the first things asked is often, ‘How did you two meet?’ You already know the couple is together. What you’re hoping for is a good story.... In a romance, you always get a good story.”

It’s a nice spin on Nora Roberts’ perennial assertions that romance is about the journey to the happy ending, not the happy ending itself, and focusing on the ending discounts that journey. Way to go Flynn and Lofty for a job well done.