Me? The ability to wave my hands and have clutter, dirty dishes, and random crap strewn about my house instantly in its place. This particularly applies to the stuffed animals that one of my cats sees fit to “kill” and “present” to us while we’re not home, leaving us with about six or seven “dead” stuffed animals on the kitchen floor every single day.
Cheyenne’s is similar - a wave of one hand, and the house is clean. What about you? What powerful spell would you like to have in your arsenal? Never being late? Never sitting in traffic (oh, I might have to change my answer now....)? Name your spell in the next 24 hours, and Cheyenne will pick 13 winners. Bibbity, bobbity, boo!
Phinea: “I would be able to run my fingers through my hair and it would be perfectly styled.”
Ana: “I would like to have a spell that could cloak my desk and computer at work from everybody else’s eyes (but specially my manager’s) so that I can spend the whole day reading blogs, writing reviews and reading ebooks without worrying that someone will catch me in flagrante delicto.”
Tibbles: “My wish would be that all the sick children in the world would get better and never be ill again. And I don’t mean the sniffles or the flu; I mean the kids with things like cancer and aids and kidney failure. I feel blessed every day that my kids are healthy and would love for every parent in the world to know that same peace of mind.
I am also married to one of those men who leave everything where it’s convenient for him, so that would be wish #2.”
Leeann Burke: “I love the calorie free food and clean house.
However I would also like to control time to stop it so I can get a breath and enjoy the moment. I don’t know about anyone else but I always want to enjoy the moment or I tell myself I should, but never have time or make the time to do just that. So if I could I would like to have tha ability to freeze time to catch my breath or enjoy the moment.”
Vicki: “The instant transport thing is very tempting and I have wished for that when I have been travelling. However, I think I would go with “health and happiness” that I could spell onto a person in need of it. In a sense, that is what I try to do every day as a pediatrician, but it would be nice to have it work quickly and reliably and not have to depend on tired moms remembering meds.”
Jessa Slade: “Since world peace has been taken…
I’d like a smoothing spell. It could go like this:
Twist me, knot me, crinkle me, nay.
When I wrinkle my nose this way
Every knot and twist in my day
Is oh so smoothly wiped away.
This would take care of age and bed-head related morning maintenance routines; laundry issues; interpersonal communications; traffic snarls; and possibly that world peace thing too.
You’d have to wear slip-on shoes all the time and you’d need a counteracting spell when you wanted kinky sex. But other than that I think it’d be useful.”
Tina M.: “an insulated bubbled around my house to keep out all the noise I have in my neighborhood and it would also zap people who cross onto our property line (my property is not the public park people!).”
Ember Case: “nstant Cabana Boy Crew.
At a snap of my fingers, a whole crew of cabana boys (why stop with one when you can have a flock/swarm/harem) would instantly appear, willing to fulfil my every desire. These cabana boys would be willing to do any dirty, nasty thing I wish.
You know what I mean - drive car pool. Drop off the dry cleaning. Pick up the limbs TS Fay blew down that still litter my yard. Take out the trash. Take the stack of packages to the post office. Remember to do daily back ups of the mission critical files on the pc.
What did you think I meant? ;)”
Isabeau: “One that I haven’t seen, that I totally wouldn’t mind at all, is a spell that would allow perfect communication. Sometimes I’m pretty much nonverbal (because of pain/exhaustion/whatever) and would love to have, not telepathy, but an ability to find the words I need; sometimes I say one thing and the other person hears something completely different; this would take care of both those things, as it would allow me to say what needs to be said and allow the other person to hear what I mean.
...and if it extends to “putting the story I’m writing on paper exactly as it is in my head”, so much the better.”
Mahaira: “Since I live far far away, I can’t visit any book signing or RT book fair. I would love a spell that can help me go back and forth, havng fun with my fav authors. Also, it would be wonderful if I win all those awesome contests and comeback with loads of books and stuff!”
Cherbear: “For myself, I’d like extra time when I need it. So I can get enough sleep, get my house cleaned, make dinner, get 2 kids to 2 different activities at opposite ends of the city, catch my train, do my hair, not be late for anything, get all my work done and not have to stay late. Well you get the picture.”
Katherine Dupuie: “If I had to pick a spell it would be to have my bills paid. The stress would be gone and I could read and relax.”
LiJuun: “At all hours of the day, whenever I need a meal or a snack, one will pop up. Food from all around the world, with exactly the type of nutrients I need at that moment, nothing I don’t need, and tasting exactly what I happen to be in the mood for right then. Time for lunch? A perfectly prepared Maine lobster would appear. Dinner? Moroccan lamb comin’ right up! Feeling a bit peckish at around three? A nice little dish of Kalamata olives would be nice. The trick is to match what I need nutrition-wise to what I need taste/texture wise.
And, of course, if I’m at work, it will appear unobtrusively in a brown paper bag and take the form of something likely to be brought for lunch. A salad from Greece or a sandwich from . . . someplace that’s famous for really good sandwiches. The possibilities are endless!”
Here’s a cool charitable opportunity, should you have a serious hankering to tell the world about your favorite pair of shoes. I have to ask what my favorite pair might be… probably Danskos. I’d give up a lot of things, including breakfast and that magic yogurt I love, to spend every day in Danskos. But then, my feet are lesbians. They only tolerate comfortable shoes.
However, I can totally write a review that will fund a charity.
Attention all shoe lovers, critics and writers: Soles4Souls, the international shoe charity, needs YOUR help! Just 3 minutes of your time will equal 3 pairs of shoes for kids in need.
How is this possible? Our friends at Epinions.com are always on the lookout for simple, well-written reviews on products from toasters to cars. Shoe reviews make their website better and gives honest feedback to consumers looking to buy their next pair of sneakers, work boots, fashionable pumps and comfy flip-flops.
Epinions is looking for anyone to write a paragraph or two on your favorite (or least favorite) pair of shoes in your closet. As an incentive, they will donate $5 for EACH REVIEW to Soles4Souls. That equals about 3 pairs of shoes for 3 minutes of work!
To get started, visit www.epinions.com/shoes and sign up to become a member (it’s fast and free). Then write some reviews about your pairs of shoes (and if it’s a bad review, you can always donate them to Soles4Souls). But please, don’t wait too long - this promotion will end on December 31st. So break out your critiquing skills and start writing...some bare soles will thank you for it.
Remember, 3 Minutes = 3 Pairs.
If you have any questions about this promotion, please visit www.giveshoes.org for details.
[Thanks to Diane for the link.]
Cheyenne McCray has 13 ARCs of her new book Dark Magic and these ARCs are looking for homes. Why not with Bitchery members, right? The book comes out in November, so you can get a sneak peek at the story. All you have to do is come up with an answer to the following question: if you could create one fail-safe spell that would be yours to use forever, what would it be?
