JP, why are you here if you dislike romance? That certainly seems to be the case from your comments.
Feel free to take your genre-sneering (because every genre has a formulaic requirement equivalent to the HEA) elsewhere.
We’ve mentioned the Romance Novel Magnetic Poetry Kit before on this website. I’ve been the proud owner of a set for the past couple of years--a friend of mine gave a set to me as a birthday present a little while ago, and I’ve put it to good use. I use the poetry to hold down photos on the fridge, with the words acting as commentary as well as anchors; below are my two favorite uses.
Number 1: The Very Tall Husband wore a magenta tutu and a pink wig one Halloween, and the picture below has always been one of my favorite photos of him. There was only one option for the photo, as far as I was concerned:
The poetry, in case you can’t read it, says:
he ripped open her tattered dress
revealing her giant bulging manhood!
the butler watched with a ready and willing member.
Number 2: This was a picture taken...holy shit, 7 years ago, when the VTH and I first started dating, and it’s probably my favorite picture of the two of us of all time, because it captures a LOT about our relationship with each other. I was standing on a chair, and I was still an inch shorter than him. Again, the choice of words was immediately obvious to me.
The poetry says:
her tongue fought off the wand of pleasure
he
savagely
petted
his
secret cavern
We’re inordinately fond of the gay jokes, yes we are. I was looking at the poetry on the fridge, and the vast majority of them have a pretty strong queer bent (as it were, heh heh heh).
Man, I really want to submit the picture above for my author photo, inclusive of the magnetic poetry. I really doubt it’d fly, though.

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JP, why are you here if you dislike romance? That certainly seems to be the case from your comments.
Feel free to take your genre-sneering (because every genre has a formulaic requirement equivalent to the HEA) elsewhere.
Does it count as “worst cover” when it’s really just “worst title”? I mean… ugh!
What makes it “worst cover” for me is that the image doesn’t fit the title.
[…]Many know of and give credit to Louis C. Tiffany for his masterpieces in stained glass, which came from his studio in New York.[…]
Does it count as “worst cover” when it’s really just “worst title”? I mean… ugh!
I’m still looking at the second-prize winner, and wondering which ass let Clay Aiken and Calista Flockhart pose for the cover of a romance novel.
