Thisiseitherreallytongue-in-cheek,orreallytacky.Youdecide.

by Candy Thursday, March 16, 2006 at 06:01 PM

An eagle-eyed Smart Bitch reader has noticed that Kinley MacGregor’s Sword of Darkness has a pretty prominent blurb by Sherrilyn Kenyon on it.

Given that MacGregor and Kenyon are the same person, I don’t know whether to give the ole girl a pat on the back for her ingenuity and bronze balls, or laugh and cringe at the tackiness. The wording on the blurb is pretty damn clever. I imagine MacGregor WOULD write fantasy in much the same way Kenyon would....

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ThePriceofTemptationbyM.J.Pearson

by SB Sarah Wednesday, March 15, 2006 at 07:08 PM
Our Grade:
C+
Title: The Price of Temptation
Author: M.J. Pearson
Publication Info: Seventh Window Publications 2005 , ISBN: 0971708932
Genre: Regency

Ah, the infamous elephantits cover, from our cover snark on gay romance illustrations. It’s quite difficult not to judge a book by its cover, when the cover is so completely outrageous, AND when the man with the basket-balls appears on BOTH the front AND the back cover. I am usually not at all bothered by the appearance of what I read on the bus, but this could have raised some serious eyebrows with the homeland security folks on the subway. I mean, what IS he hiding in his trousers?

But my quest was not to evaluate the cover - we already did that. My job was to read the content, and really, it’s a shame this book has such a bizarre depiction on the front because as a romance, and as a gay romance, and as a historical, the cover does not exist on the same planet as the quality of the story and of the writing.

More,more,more!>
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Isthataswordorareyoujusthappytoseeme?

by SB Sarah Monday, March 13, 2006 at 10:55 AM

Ann Lawrence is one lucky lady. Not only is she quite funny (I’ve met her) but her covers? All feature the Majestic DeSalvo.

Oddly, he’s always holding something long, hard and equally majestic when he’s depicted on her books. Makes me wonder if the art department is trying to..convey something. I mean, you don’t have to hit me over the head with it; I’ll figure it out eventually. Hmm. Maybe he’s going fishing?

image

Sarah: Lord of the Mist meets Lord of the Wind. It’s like the best grudge match ever! The Lord of the Mist, nebulous like the vapor, cunning as the fog, but damn, he carries a big ass stick. Is he any match for the Lord of the Wind’s, ur, wind?

Candy: Every Saturday, yon Lord of the Mist wreaks devastation in his wake, turning formerly thriving cities into desolate desolate swamps with his dank, noxious fogs--because that’s always the day cook makes her special Lentil Soup and Devilled Eggs lunch.

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Sarah: I tell you what, the Lord of the Keep also carries a big ol’ stick, too. What a curious angle he’s holding it at, almost as if he’s… implying something. And if the big stick didn’t get my attention, that come hither “Hey, Baby, wanna play with my fishing tackle?” look is certainly a winner.

Candy: Looking at this cover, I get the feeling this dude enjoys duelling with other swords a lot more than sheathing it in a scabbard--if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

image

Sarah: There is nothing virtual about it: This cover has actual mantitty, actual improbable washboard belly, and absolutely breathtaking phallic symbolism. I don’t think he wants to monkey with the Lord of the Mist, though. That would not end well.

Candy: You know a model’s in trouble when he’s trying to out-emote the wooden staff in his hands--and losing.

When I see all three covers, I picture the characters talking like Azul Falcone. “Pretty silken underthings for everybody! And now, we make PARRRTY!” (Ha ha… sissy European lisp thingy.)

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WEWINATTHEINTERNET

by Candy Friday, March 10, 2006 at 06:40 AM

Reader Firefly alerted us last night: Our attempt to Google Bomb asshead extraordinaire, Bill Napoli, has been a rousing success! As of 6:45 a.m. on March 10, 2006, the number 1 Google result for Bill Napoli is our definition page.

For posterity:

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(Click on image to see full screencap, if you’re into screencappiness.)

Everybody now: SNOOPY MOTHERFUCKING DANCE OF JOY!

This is a symbolic victory, of course. The ugly fight is just beginning. If you live in states that are being affected by these recent attempts to ban abortions, such as South Dakota, Mississippi and Tennessee, write to your reps. Write to your newspapers. Make some noise. VOTE. Those of us who don’t: We can make some noise of our own, and give money/volunteer as we can to the groups who will be fighting these sorts of legislation.

The three big ones:

Planned Parenthood
NARAL-Pro Choice
ACLU

As always, any suggestions for other worthy organizations are welcome, as well as suggestions for other types of concrete action we can take.

p.s. This childish of me, but: Holy shit, we totally introduced a new term to the Internet. GLEE!

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Napoli..bus?Somekindofa…SPIKETRAP?!

by Candy Wednesday, March 08, 2006 at 02:29 PM

YAY and YAY AGAIN and THANK YOU to all of you who are spreading the good word about Bill Napoli. I don’t know about you, but I feel a certain warm glow from napoling this asshole, even if it’s merely figurative.

For those of you who, like me, feel like you have a very real stake in this but don’t live in South Dakota and/or have your hands tied because you can’t vote, may I suggest that you throw whatever spare cash you have at these fine organizations, who will likely be challenging the abortion ban law and need all the help they can get?

Planned Parenthood
NARAL-Pro Choice
ACLU

Anyone else have other suggestions for other worthy organizations, as well as more direct action we can take, besides feeding, watering and petting your local reproductive freedom activists and civil rights lawyers (if you’re not one yourself)?

Note:
I’m going to leave this entry and the the napoli entry stickied for a couple of days, which means it’ll stay on top, even though we’ll post new content. That ensures it’ll get maximum visibility for just that much longer for people who are visiting this for the first time. Regular trashy novel bitchenating will resume soon; just scroll down to get to it.

Updated to add:

I checked Blogsnow because we were getting a bunch of hits from that site, and HOLY SHIT, Y’ALL. The Bill Napoli definition page is coming in at number 8 for “most linked to page.”

I shit you not. I took a screencap for posterity. The close-up is below; click on it to get the full screencap.

image

Again, thank you. Y’all motherfucking rock.

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