Smart Bitches Trashy Books | All of the romance, none of the bullshit.

Candy would have a field day with this list, and since there’s 8 entries and it could go ALL THE WAY TO 11, I bet there will be other suggestions in the comments. Thanks to Bitchery reader Becca for the link:

The Top 8 Worst Lines in Sci-Fi Erotica

8> She shivered as he ran his eyes over her. She was almost sorry when he retracted them back into his skull.

7> After many attempts by the rookie space cadet, the spaceship finally fit snugly into the landing bay, but he had opened the escape hatch too soon, spilling the ship’s occupants on to the floor.

6> Later that evening, after their shifts were over, the captain discovered that hailing frequencies weren’t the *only* thing his communications officer had open!

5> The nanites touched her in ways no micromachine ever had.

4> He thrust into her at last, only to discover that his father was right –- it really was just like Mom’s blood-liver pie.

3> It had been a long night and Tank McPhoton was tired and drained as he had never been tired and drained before. He hadn’t realized that female Vaginarians have 18 major orifices and expect a male to satisfy each and every one of them.

2> Rumor had it the new lieutenant could suck harder than the black hole of Iridani-Beta.

and the Number 1 Worst Line in Sci-Fi Erotica…

1> She found herself unable to control her quivering. She had never felt like this. The quivering frequency increased and increased, and suddenly she exploded. “Sad,” said the hot, chisel-chinned starfighter pilot who had inadvertently caused her demise, “she was the last of their race. They all went like that when they saw me.”

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Categories: But...that's not really about romance novels • The Link-O-Lator

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